|I have to confess the first time I heard the term "ghosted," I thought it had to do with Halloween or maybe parapsychology, as I know there's increased interest in the topic (my oldest daughter would watch shows such as Ghosthunters). But then Black explained it had nothing to do with ghouls and goblins, and when she initially told me that it's when someone suddenly "disappears" from your life without so much as a call, email, or text, I didn't believe her. I now know it's become a common phenomenon in the dating world, although I don't care how "common" it becomes; call me old-fashioned, but I find it downright rude. And inexcusable.|
|Going back decades, I know there have been first dates that,
at the time, I thought went well. But, after getting the "I'll call
you" line … the phone never rang, so in that sense, "ghosting" is not an
entirely new phenomenon. However, I was recently "ghosted" by someone
I had been dating, and although I am not sure we were a good match, his decision to just disappear was
not only inconsiderate but demonstrated a lack of basic manners.
And, ghosting is not limited to dating as it is also happening in the workplace – including when hiring and even when quitting. There is a phrase, "Give up the ghost," that means to stop making an effort, and it seems manners are rapidly going out of style, but I hope people are not "giving up the ghost" on them.
What is it about wearing white after Labor Day? And why is it a question without a definitive answer? And who decided it would be a perfect question to ask … in a Twizzlers commercial?!
I'm probably the last person to ask a fashion question, full
stop. In fact, during the early days of
my crisis, when I was looking to save every penny and was canceling all my
magazine subscriptions, Black told me I could cancel the fashion ones as it was
obvious that I never looked at any of them.
But "InStyle" does have some good
fashion tips about wearing white after Labor Day.|
For me, I'll probably wear my white long sleeve shirts (I'm not a fan of tee shirts) until at least November as here in the Houston area it stays pretty warm well into fall, and white is such a "cool" (temperature, not style) color to wear. There's nothing else white in my wardrobe because the combination of being a redhead with pale skin and being a mom means white isn't a flattering or practical color. But I'm curious what Black, the fashion maven of our family, has to say about wearing white …
I am not going to get into the
psychology of fashion, but I find the concept of
"fashion rules" almost an
as I have always thought of fashion as being fluid and creative, and a
reflection of your individuality. Plus,
some rules (especially fashion ones)
are meant to be broken
wearing white after Labor Day. Otherwise,
why would the term "
" even exist?
However, I find the history of not wearing white after Labor Day fascinating, although possibly elitist. And, although I would never equate my sense of style to that of Coco Chanel, who went against the trends of her time and wore white year-round, I believe white never goes out of season.
should ask, as I was recently getting ready for a garage sale of our mom’s things and came across an old metal carrying
basket that I think is for milk bottles.
Although my memory of our milkman
is that he left the milk bottles in a small rectangular metal box outside our
Anyway, my best memory of fresh milk, especially chocolate milk, was going to Dairy Barn with our dad. It was a drive-through; we’d return the old bottles, get our deposit back, and pick up new ones. I have to admit that when my mom started to get milk at our local Waldbaum’s (anyone growing up on Long Island will remember them) in paper cartons, I thought it was a little sad. Plus, I didn’t think the milk tasted as good.
Recently, when I saw some old-fashioned milk bottles from 1836 Farms at my local Kroger, although it was more expensive, I bought one just because it reminded me of my youth. In fact, when I initially told Black I wasn’t sure I wanted to spend that much on milk, she suggested I could reuse the bottle as a vase. And it always makes me smile!
Since you mentioned your grandmother, which makes me feel
old, you may have to ask her to explain what we meant when we teased Red, a
redhead in a family of brunettes, of being the “milkman’s
Looking back, “milkmen” and dairy delivery services were ahead of their time. They delivered milk as well as other dairy products, and seem to be a precursor to Instacart, Amazon Fresh, and all the food delivery services. Not to mention, it was a way to reuse the glass milk bottles (remember, this was decades before recycling was a “thing”).
Regardless, when we taught at KIPP Houston High School, I asked our students if they had ever heard of a milkman. (Most had not.) And then (of course), I followed up with an assortment of other questions … Can jobs become obsolete? What creates new opportunities? Do you think there may be jobs in the future that no one has ever heard of yet? What can you do to be prepared? So, if nothing else, I hope the milkman makes you stop and think …
ostrich by nature, I guess sticking my head in the sand wouldn’t be the answer
you’re looking for. Although,
ironically, I find the less
news I watch, the better. But
a “trick” I learned as a teenager (when I was a kid, I thought it was a
punishment) is taking a nap, even if it’s only for 15 minutes. Sometimes just lying down, even when I’m not
tired, lets my batteries recharge. Other
times, when I have a lot going on in my head, I find a nap, or a short walk,
which gives me the added benefit of a little exercise, gives me a few minutes
of calm. Periodically, I tell Black that
I’m going to try to get away for a few days or even have a “staycation”,
where the objective is to do nothing, but it never seems to happen.
Of course, anyone that knows me knows that movies are my great escape. And, yes, it’s because I love the popcorn. But there’s something about getting lost in what’s on the screen and forgetting the craziness of everyday life. Even if that means my theater degree sometimes kicks in, and I’m analyzing the movie instead of enjoying it at face value.
Asking a workaholic how to relax or escape may seem like an oxymoron, but if you
will accept a “do as I say, not as I do” moment, I would suggest trying to find
balance. Of course, I have a car analogy
– a traffic light.
My escape, though, is through exercise. Although, I recently bought a hammock, which may seem strange for a workaholic living in a high rise. I was intrigued by the company (Yellow Leaf), their Shark Tank negotiations, and their backstory of empowering women by creating jobs that ultimately transform families. So, when I noticed they had a “Hammock Throne” (that is the actual name)that would fit in a corner of my balcony, I ordered it. Little did I know it would become a wonderful way to relax and a great escape (ok, I admit I use it to do business reading).