| I had hoped that in the weeks since the overturning of Roe v. Wade, I would’ve calmed down or realized that maybe things aren’t as bad as they seem. But as we’re beginning to see all the implications, and not just on abortions, it only gets worse! |
| And, provides yet another issue on which our country is divided. It is a very complicated issue, and not as simple as answering “Should abortions be legal?” with a “yes” or “no.” Theoretically, what the Supreme Court did was decide that it is not the court’s responsibility to regulate abortion. That power belongs to the states. And, in theory, is for each to decide. |
| I can’t believe you just said that. What about the millions of women who, literally overnight, were stripped of a right they’ve enjoyed for 50 years? What about all the women whose lives will be at risk because they’ve lost the right to make decisions about their own bodies? What about the women who were victims of sexual crimes who might not only have to bear their assailant’s child but might even have to give them visitation rights?! |
| All valid points. And, a very emotional argument. For those against abortion, many take a strong religious position and are just as passionate. |
| Intellectually, I know that. But as accommodating as I am, and as much as I don’t like confrontation, when it comes to abortion, I just don’t see any other side. I know you’re the debate queen, so please tell me you’re just playing devil’s advocate. Especially as I'd think you'd be pro-choice, not pro-life! |
| Just like abortion is not a clear-cut yes/no decision, and by the way, the majority of Americans support abortion, the terms pro-choice and pro-life make it sound like it is an either/or decision. And, at the risk of you accusing me of being too literal … who is against life? And, in terms of choice … do we not each get to choose what our religious beliefs are? So, extrapolating from there … most people are BOTH pro-life and pro-choice. |
| Mommy was right, you should have been a lawyer. But that doesn’t change the fact that abortions are now illegal in some states. The people who don’t believe in abortions are making choices for everyone. And that’s not right. What if they try to outlaw abortions at a federal level?! |
| Well, I wish I knew more about Constitutional Law. But, I cannot help but wonder if the Supreme Court, if they genuinely were trying to let us all decide for ourselves about abortion, could not have said that Roe v. Wade would be overturned effective January 1, 2027, or some date that gives everyone a chance to elect state officials that represent their wishes. Or, better yet, have a referendum that specifically allows us to vote on reproductive rights. Allow “We the people” to have our voices and votes govern. |
| First of all, I have to question the integrity of the court as those voting to overturn seemed to have voted along political and religious beliefs, and then explained it as their legal positions. Regardless, I can hear them claiming that we’ve already elected our government officials. |
| Ah, but not based on their position toward abortion and reproductive rights. That was supposedly already decided half a century ago with Roe v. Wade, so I doubt many people even thought about it. And, I cannot imagine any candidate would volunteer anything that might lose them votes. |
| No kidding. But once elected, that didn’t stop them from making laws that affect abortions. It was as if they were waiting for Roe v. Wade to be overturned. |
| Texas even found a way around it by allowing private citizens to sue anyone who “aids and abets” an abortion and dangling a “$10,000 bounty”. But, what if the tables were turned and elected officials had to take personal responsibility for their positions. |
| Sorry, you’ve lost me. |
| If they vote to ban all abortions, basically taking the position that abortion is murder (their words, not mine), then if it is discovered that they ever assisted with arranging and/or paying for an abortion (legal or otherwise) – be that a spouse, girlfriend, mistress, relative, etc. – then they face the consequences of being an accessory to murder. |
| They’d never agree to that! |
| And, that is my point. But, they have no problem telling others what they can and cannot do, refusing to let us decide for ourselves. OK, how about allowing people who previously could get an abortion but no longer can to instead “donate” the fertilized embryos? |
| But it wouldn’t be able to survive on its own. It would probably need a surrogate mother. Or expensive medical equipment. |
| If a woman has the right to put a child up for adoption, would that right not begin at the same exact time as when it is deemed a life? I am not trying to decide what is wrong or right, but I would like consistency. And, a women’s right to decide what happens to her body. |
| That’s where this conversation started! And why I’m so upset. Almost 250 years ago, our founding fathers fought for our freedom. Over 100 years ago, women got the right to vote. Roe v. Wade was passed 50 years ago, and now those rights have been taken away. I never thought I’d see the day when my daughters would have fewer rights than I did. |
| Well, as a very independent woman who climbed the ranks to management in male-dominated industries, I faced many challenges being a woman. But, I never felt like a second-class citizen … until now. |
Want to read other columns? Here's a list.
The more things change — the more they stay the same. Red will be seeing in the new year with an old movie (and some late-night popcorn), while Black will be fast asleep (or possibly working) as 2025 turns to 2026. So, we smiled when we re-read our New Year’s Eve post from 2022 (see below) …
The memories remain. The only difference? This year, when we wish you Happy New Year, we’ve updated it to … and may 2026 be filled with health and happiness, love and laughter.
| I remember when I was growing up and old enough to stay home alone (long before the movie “Home Alone”) on New Year’s Eve. Our parents may have gone out to celebrate, but I had the perfect evening. Before they left, they’d get me my favorite takeout Chinese food (again, long before the days of food delivery services), and I’d savor the egg drop soup with wontons and a large container of pork fried rice, knowing that I didn’t have to share with anyone. Then, I’d settle in for a night of old movies on TV, only taking a short break to watch the ballcome down in Times Square, before going back to watching movies for hours. (Long after my parents had come home and gone to sleep.) Fast forward more decades than I care to admit, and my favorite way to celebrate New Year’s Eve is pretty much the same. Except now, what would be even more perfect would be to have my daughters home with me. |
| I started to say that Red has always needed to get a life, but the reality is that I understand why she likes a quiet New Year’s Eve and has created her own “special” tradition. Over the years, I would celebrate New Year’s Eve by going out to a “special” dinner with my spouse or significant other (if applicable) and dear friends. The funny thing is the older we get, the earlier we return home. We tell ourselves it is because we do not want to be on the roads with the drunks, but that does not explain why we all admit we usually are asleep well before midnight. |
Whether celebrating by yourself or with others … whether you find yourself feeling extra warm and fuzzy and reminiscing at midnight, like Red, or being pragmatically optimistic, like Black, who will raise a glass and toast her friends as well as the promise and hope that the new year offers us all … we want to wish you,
Happy New Year! And may 2023 be filled with health and happiness, love and laughter.
Tonight is the first night of Chanukah (FYI, there are multiple "correct" spellings), and while Red may be celebrating the Festival of Lights with potato latkes (pancakes), when she lights the menorah to symbolize bringing light into darkness, she’ll be laughing at Black’s car analogy …
| At the risk of Black coming up with another potato analogy, for me, Chanukah's all about potato latkes. The childhood memories of our dad grating pounds and pounds of potatoes to the point where I'm not sure I could see our kitchen table, many decades later, my eldest daughter taste-testing latkes from an assortment of places. (I love to cook, but latkes are a lot of work.) Of course, the lighting of the menorah is also such a special part of the holiday celebration, whether the electric menorah that my parents had where you would "twist" each light bulb as the nights progressed or the more traditional menorah with candles that my daughters and I light each year (and never leave unattended). |
| I never cease to be amazed by the miracle of Chanukah (regardless of whether you spell it Chanukah or Hanukkah, or some other variation) and how the oil that was only supposed to last one day instead lasted for eight days. It is as if your cellphone indicated it is at 12% but lasts eight days. Or, if the gas gauge in your car indicates you have 25 miles left, but you are able to drive 200 miles. Sometimes things happen that defy logic, and that is where faith takes over. And, a belief in something bigger than all of us. |
Tomorrow is the start of Chanukah, the Festival of Lights, which celebrates hope and miracles – and who could not use hope and miracles?
Happy Chanukah!
Every year on #GivingTuesday, Red tells Black that she knows how important giving is – whether time or money – but, unlike Black, she doesn’t have a meaningful charity that’s been part of her life for decades. We often “repeat” the conversation below, but this year, Black suggested that Red use #GivingTuesday to think about what charity inspires her or holds special meaning, and then get involved. Making it personal often ends up making it a year-round passion rather than a one-off obligation.
But no matter how you approach charity, beware of potential scammers. And, if in doubt — check them out! (Black likes GuideStar and Charity Navigator.)
| I know today’s Giving Tuesday, but what I always find so amazing is how you treat every day as “Giving Tuesday." |
| What makes you say that? I do not donate to an organization or charity every day. |
| You’re always so literal. I meant that the spirit of “giving to others”, whether donating or providing support in some way, seems to be part of your daily life. |
| I think you are exaggerating. |
| Really? What about your involvement with The Make-A-Wish Foundation? That’s been going on for years. And it didn’t take a “holiday” to get you involved. |
| Actually, it was a golf tournament decades ago. But once you see the difference you can make, even if it is a small donation because they add up, it becomes a way of life. Or, at least, it did for me. |
| I know you’ve quietly done things for other organizations and people, too. Living in the Houston area, we have no shortage of natural disasters, and we’ve seen people’s generosity. But what I like about GivingTuesday is it’s not waiting for a specific event because there are so many worthwhile charities that need our support every day. |
| Agree. And, although I am not always a huge fan of social media, #GivingTuesday – note the hashtag – started in 2012 to harness the power of the internet for hashtag activism and, more specifically, to inspire people and companies to give back. |
| Well, social media or not, I know how important it is to give back and help others. And it’s not always about money. Sometimes they need people to donate their time or expertise. I just wish we didn’t need a tragic event or “special day” as a reminder. |
| So, now that you have been reminded, stop talking to me and do your fair share for #GivingTuesday. Trust me, you will be glad you did. |
Today (Black would probably say “every day”) is the perfect day to give back to others, so check out this great list of ideas and pick one (or more) and become part of #GivingTuesday!
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