Learning For Life

A Simple List For ... How To Survive And Thrive The Holidays?!

Without fail, every year, I feel overwhelmed by the holidays, and without fail, Black reminds me that I know what to do or, in some cases, what not to do. And then she suggests (sarcastically, I might add) I reread the very simple (but invaluable) list I wrote in 2020. Maybe next year, I’ll put “read my holiday survival checklist” on one of my many lists of things to do

It's official! The holiday "silly season" (as I call it) is now underway and before I know it, it will be New Year's Day and I'll be looking back and asking, "Where did December go?!" This year's holiday goals …


Avoid feeling exhausted, get everything important checked off my list, and have time to enjoy the spirit of the season.

I love my lists, but when it comes to the holidays you can truly go crazy! There's lots of detailed holiday checklists online, but I felt overwhelmed just reading them. So, I created the following checklist to help me stay focused on what's important, and hope it gives you some food-for-thought.

  1. Gifts – Gifts – Gifts

It's really easy to drive yourself crazy, so it's critical to write down not only the WHO and WHAT, but also WHEN to shop. Remember to consider things that can cause stress later – small things like you forgot to get gift wrapping supplies to the large like large January credit card statements, so make sure to have and follow a BUDGET.

  1. Wishing All Happy Holidays!

I started to call this a holiday card list but then realized that the only cards I give are to my daughters. Everyone else I either email, text, call, or FaceTime. To me, it's making sure I reach out to everyone on this list.

  1. It's All About The Food

I don't know about you, but it's not a holiday without our favorite foods. But those don't just magically appear. It has to be planned – starting with what to make from scratch and what can be bought already made. Add in shopping, prep time, and actual cooking, and you have a plan. The holidays are definitely a food marathon, but a little bit of planning and time management will go a long way.

  1. Making Your Home Festive

For me, that means at least one inflatable on my front lawn and decorations in the most used areas of the house. (Black would call them "high traffic" areas.) I'll admit that I have fewer decorations than I did when the girls were little, and I love it that way. The house looks festive but it doesn't take me days to set up and then put away.

  1. What Are We Doing Today?

It doesn't matter whether it's your kids asking this question or the adults in your life – everyone wants to "do something" during the holidays. Of course, I'm usually responsible for planning holiday activities, and with this year's corona-craziness it will mean a little more thought and creativity. But hopping in the car and looking at Christmas lights or just taking a road trip for the day may well be in my future!

  1. Remember Others

I don't need to tell you that the holidays are a tough time for so many, and this year it's going to be even more so. So, think about possibly doing something for others – whether making a donation, delivering food, giving some of your time, the possibilities are endless. And will put you in the holiday spirit!

  1. Don't Forget About You!

If you're the person "in charge" of making sure the holidays are special for everyone else, it can be stressful and all-consuming. In the past, I'd "escape" for a few hours to the movies but, unfortunately, that's not an option this year. (I admit it … I miss movie popcorn!) So remember to do something for you. For me, the best gift is time. Time to do whatever I want, even if it means doing nothing.

As always, I wondered what Black thought/would put on her list, if she even has one as she's definitely NOT a holiday person. Her response? "Well, my holidays are much simpler as I live alone and have a very short list of people and business associates who receive gifts and, with the exception of my nieces, most are edible treats I order online. For me, charitable giving is year-long. And, I stopped sending holiday cards years ago and no one seemed to miss them. But, I do have one holiday tradition on my checklist that is being modified this year."

  • Black's Holiday "Blast From The Past"

Every year, I send about a dozen people a very short, personalized, and to-the-point email to let them know that I am thinking about them. Starting this year, I am going to add a few people to the list who I have not "spoken" with for some time, just to let them know they have not been forgotten.

If you have gotten this far, I have one last item …

HO-HO-HO Happy Holidays!
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Design by Sawyer Pennington

Sometimes, the hardest part of a meaningful conversation is simply getting started ...


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I love that people told us they were using our sisterly banter to start conversations with family, friends, coworkers, and even in classrooms. But I had to laugh when you then decided to create an assortment of CONVERSATION STARTERS.


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It seemed logical to me. Begin with us looking at a real-life topic and providing our very different (to put it mildly) perspectives. Then, provide a few questions to help continue the conversation, consider other viewpoints, and perhaps learn something new. About the topic and one another.


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The best part is that there are no “right” or “wrong” answers. You may not agree, but you can still listen, be polite, and respect differing viewpoints and opinions. The point is to …
Stop, think, listen, and talk.

Red & Black Conversation Starters … Pick a topic. Read the banter. Choose a question that interests you. Or create your own. The questions are simply there to get the conversation started — where it goes from there is up to you.

P.S. – Readers are telling us that our weekly newsletters are getting them thinking, talking, and even laughing. But don’t take our word for it, sign up at the bottom of this page and see for yourself!

Design by Sawyer Pennington

Our banter may start with two sisters, but it’s getting families, friends, and even classrooms talking.


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When I first heard the term "digital literacy," I wasn't exactly sure what it meant, but I'll admit that I feel like a dinosaur when it comes to technology, and usually turn to my daughters for help. I don't know if it's just generational, but I'm intimidated by my computer, and although I can do the basics, any time things go "wrong", I default into panic mode, followed by feeling lost and frustrated. And the thought of buying a new computer? Well, it gives me a headache — not only the cost but especially learning how to use it. And if I lose internet service, I feel disconnected from the world. (I guess that can sometimes be a good thing.)

Then there's my cell phone, and I admit that smartphones often make me feel stupid. I remember when phones were landlines, and cordless was a big deal. Now I'm walking around with a small computer that also makes phone calls and takes photos. I've learned how to text, load some simple apps, and even how to set the alarm clock, but that's about it.


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I know us "older" people think younger people are technology-savvy, but many are merely technology-dependent, which is very different. Technology is much more than access and setup. Being able to use computers, smartphones, and the internet covers a wide range of "basics" (such as emails and other communication tools, web browsers, and search engines), and there are specific computer skills that improve our productivity (such as word processing and spreadsheets). Plus, you often need web conferencing skills (like Zoom or other audio and video applications) to interview for a job.

But, that is only the beginning. Since we live in a digital world, we need the skills to find and analyze information, and also make sure it is accurate and credible. (What is that adage, "Garbage in — garbage out"?) However, it is not only finding the right information, it is then knowing what to do with it. Including what and how to share.

THE CONVERSATION STARTERS

  • How would you describe digital literacy? What skills do you think are necessary to manage daily life? To be successful in the workplace?
  • Why does using technology correctly seem so daunting?
  • What do you think is the best way to learn about technology and become digitally literate?
  • How do you decide whether online information is accurate and credible?

P.S. – You might be interested in this animated video on Research & Analytical Skills we did as part of a soft skills series for The Greater Houston Partnership's UpSkill Houston initiative.

Design by Sawyer Pennington

Our banter may start with two sisters, but it’s getting families, friends, and even classrooms talking.


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People seem to disagree about everything these days. And instead of listening to one another, everyone seems determined to prove why they’re right.

Growing up, and really until my crisis forced me to change (prompted by you, I might add), I’ve always preferred to avoid conflict. Still do. And most of the time, I can.

But since you’re the “debate queen”, I’m curious. How do you change someone’s mind? I suppose you’re going to say it takes having all your facts and figures ready. Or as they used to say on the 1950s TV show Dragnet, "Just the facts, ma'am."


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Ironically, the key to changing someone’s mind may be closer to your natural tendencies than you realize. Start by listening, not correcting. Telling someone how wrong they are (or how right you are) is fun if you want to start a debate — but not if you genuinely want them to consider another point of view.

And, yes, facts and figures matter, but most people find them intimidating and boring. (I know it makes your eyes glaze over.) Find out WHY they believe what they do. Look for something on which you agree. And then, explain your position and why — but not by reciting facts.

We are a storytelling society. Facts may support your point, but stories are often what help people “feel it” and see the issue differently.

THE CONVERSATION STARTERS

  • Have you ever tried to change someone's mind? How did you approach it? Did it work?
  • When you disagree with someone, do you begin by asking questions or explaining why you're right?
  • Has anyone ever changed your mind? What made you willing to reconsider?
  • Are you trying to change the other person's mind or simply win the argument?

P.S. – You might be interested in our list of “7 Ways To Change Someone’s Mind.”