| April is National Financial Literacy Month, and you love to talk about money, but I think it should be called National Financial Intimidation Month. After all, most of us “mere mortals” find personal finance intimidating. And boring. And tedious. |
| Are you done? Besides, I thought you got over that years ago. |
| Being forced to figure out the basics doesn’t make personal finance any more interesting. It’s like getting my teeth cleaned. I know I need to do it, but that doesn’t make it any more enjoyable. |
| Great analogy, especially as getting you even to think you could “do” personal finance was like pulling teeth. |
| Fine, is this where you’re going to remind me how I freaked out when you first mentioned financial statements? Or when you told me that if I could add and subtract, I was qualified? |
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| Actually, it quickly became obvious that a big part of the problem was the terminology, which is why I simplified it. |
| I remember. Especially since you love to tell people how emphatic I was that I couldn’t deal with assets and liabilities until you told me we were going to talk about “what you own” and “what you owe,” and I said I could do that. Neglecting to tell me those were the definitions. |
| My version is technically accurate. But, making it a funny story makes the topic relevant and relatable. And, memorable. |
| Like when you used to ask auditoriums full of eighth graders how many liked math, and only a handful raised their hands. But when you asked how many liked money, they ALL raised their hands! |
| Exactly. The difference is focusing on practical applications versus terminology and theory. Many people will think they are not good at math when, in reality, they are not good at theory. |
| Do you remember when you took the girls and me to Central Market? Back when Natasha was in high school and close to failing math. She had a store gift card and a basket full of items. Sawyer and I watched as the cashier entered each item, and we were betting on how much Natasha would overspend. Instead, she came in slightly under! |
| She seemed to know exactly where she stood. And, was doing it in her head. Which did not surprise me as she was always good with numbers. It is why business plans for bars, not just the creative concepts and drinks, but the numbers, come so easily to her. Natasha often struggled with the supposed “correct order” of the mathematical steps, but she understood the application. |
| But I’ve always thought of math as being very structured. With right and wrong answers. |
| Ok, if something is $7.84 and I give you a $10 bill, how will you figure out the change? And, you cannot use a calculator or smartphone. |
| Easy. Subtract $7.84 from $10. How else would you do it? |
| Add $0.16 to get to $8. Then $2 more to get to $10. I can get to the “correct” answer of $2.16 faster using addition than subtraction. |
| That’s really interesting. When you asked me how to figure it out, the straight-A student in me defaulted to how I was taught to do it. But your approach is a much easier way to get to the same answer. |
| Basic algebra. |
| Don’t even think of going there. But it does explain the trick Mommy taught me years ago about calculating the cost of something with tax. Rather than figuring out what 8.25% of the price was and then adding it to the price, I’d just multiply the number by 1.0825. |
| I doubt Mom realized the mathematical equation behind solving for “x,” but she knew why take two steps when you can take just one. Whether in your head, on paper, or using a calculator. |
| So, just like you made me realize being open to “trying” to do personal finance is about mindset, so is math. Using your logic, why not teach math, at least to those who aren’t into theory, in a practical way? And by using money examples, you also could be teaching personal finance. After all, kids may not like math, but they sure do love money. |
| Mom used to say that I excelled in math because, as a kid. I would substitute “dollars and cents” for “apples and oranges” in word problems. Although, looking back, putting me on a clothing budget when I was in middle school is what probably taught me the most. |
| I still can’t believe you never realized it was intended as a punishment, not a life lesson, until you were trying to explain budgets to me while I was in the midst of my “crisis”. |
| I still can’t believe you never learned about money until you were in your 40s, and it took your husband getting fired. But, the bottom line is that you are never too young or too old to learn. |
| About math. About money. About life. |
Want to read other columns? Here's a list.
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The more time passes, the fewer the number of people who remember D-Day happening in real-time (we’re old, but not that old), but the importance and significance of the day are more important than ever …
| I still can’t believe you didn’t know what D-Day was. |
| All I knew was it had to do with World War II and beaches. And, required lots of strategic planning. Remember, I am not a history buff like you. |
| Or a movie buff. There has been an assortment of D-Day movies, and I wouldn’t expect you to have watched the older movies, like “ The Longest Day” with John Wayne, but I figured you’d have seen “ Saving Private Ryan .” |
| The Tom Hanks movie? It was a great war movie, but from what I remember, it was about the search for a particular soldier during WWII. Although I remember the opening scene showed the horrors of war. Regardless, I do not get my “history” from movies that might take literary license for the sake of storytelling, even if Steven Spielberg’s movies are mostly accurate. |
| That opening scene WAS D-Day. |
| I know that … now. I always remembered D-Day fell on June 6 because Mom and Daddy got married on June 6 (1950). And, almost 40 years later, you got married on their anniversary. |
| Well, that’s ancient history. And unfortunately, my marriage wasn’t as successful as D-Day. Although I’m not a WWII expert, D-Day’s also known as the Battle of Normandy and considered the beginning of the end of the war in Europe. It was an incredible turning point and changed the course of the war . And history. |
| I have always found it fascinating how a singular event can turn the tide, not only through its success in the moment but in its ability to inspire people. How bravery, perseverance, and the willingness to fight for what you genuinely believe, to the death, if necessary, is extremely powerful. |
| Are you talking about D-Day or more recent events, such as the war in Ukraine? I can draw parallels as they’re both about fighting for freedom in Europe, which also impacts the world. But it’s as if people refuse to learn lessons from history. And we live in a world, in a country, that’s becoming more and more polarized, with seemingly fewer and fewer people willing to put the greater good above themselves. |
| That is why days of remembrance, such as D-Day, are so important. I may not have known the specific details, but that does not stop me from appreciating and respecting the sacrifices that so many made for our country. At the time, those soldiers may not have known the far-reaching impact of their actions, or even whether they would be successful, but that did not lessen their commitment and bravery. |
| I can’t imagine the feeling of responsibility and willingness to die for the future of the free world. Historians regard it as one of the greatest military achievements ever, but not to lessen its significance, and I’m almost embarrassed to admit this, but I’ve never known what the “D” in D-Day stands for? Maybe Departure, Decision, or even Doomsday? Although I could make a case for Democracy, Determination, or Daring. |
| How about “Day”? And no, I am not being sarcastic. “ D-Day” was an Army designation used to indicate the start date for a specific field operation. So, it does not stand for anything. At least, not at the time … because D-Day now stands for so much. |
To honor the significance of D-Day, consider taking a few moments for these inspiring quotes.
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It’s been two years since President Biden signed the anti-Asian hate crimes bill, but making something illegal doesn’t stop it from happening. Hate crimes, including against Chinese Americas, continue at an alarming rate. But imagine if instead of hating someone for being different, we looked at what we had in common and their contributions to American culture and society? After all, that’s what makes America such a unique and special country.
May is Asian American Pacific Island Month (which prompted our conversation below about Jews and Chinese food), but we should treat all our fellow Americans with respect and kindness every day.
| Have you ever wondered why Jews love Chinese food so much? |
| No, but what prompted that? Did you take in Chinese food this weekend? Or, did President Biden signing the anti-Asian hate crimes bill make you think about how Jews can relate given all the antisemitism in the world? |
| Only you would connect those dots. I was straightening up papers in the kitchen and noticed how Chinese takeout menus look the same as they did when we were kids, and how we've laughed over the decades about how much Jews love Chinese food. But now you've reminded me about how we've recently talked about the recent increase in hate crimes against the Asian community . I simply don't understand how people can hate an entire group of people based on race or religion. |
| You are the history lover. It is not a new phenomenon. And, the reasons have not changed – Ignorance, prejudice, feelings of supremacy; the list has many "reasons". What I find scary is that people form stronger bonds with others based on what they hate than they do on what they love. But, there is no question that the Asian community and Jews have experienced hate for a long time. |
| I know, but in America of all places, that just shouldn't happen. Ever. We're a country built on immigrants, and the contributions of Asian Americans and American Jews have been so significant. From scientists to doctors, artists to activists, the list goes on and on. |
| The lists of contributions can be sliced and diced in so many different ways – gender, race, religion, nationalities. There are not enough months in the years to celebrate them all. However, some groups tend to be forgotten or overlooked, which is why President Carter signed the first proclamation celebrating Asian/Pacific Americans , which eventually led to May becoming Asian American and Pacific Islander (AAPI) Heritage Month. But now, with hate crimes increasing against them, celebrating by learning about their cultures is even more critical. |
| Well, I admit that I personally didn't know any Asians before I lived in Hong Kong, and then Shanghai, several years after getting married. Until then, all I knew was that I loved Chinese food. I know that might sound condescending, but that's not how I mean it. |
| No, it sounds like you just did not have any personal experience except for enjoying the food. And, except for dating Raman Sehgal, who was from India, when I was a graduate student at NYU, my experience before moving to Houston was basically the same as yours. |
| Sorry, but I can't keep track of everyone you've dated. Anyway, I learned so much about the people and their culture when living in Asia. It made me realize just what a young country America is and how many countries have so many more centuries of history than we do. And there I was the outsider, and although I might have been seen to be different, I was never disrespected in the way Asians are treated here. |
| A redhead in Asia. I bet you stood out like a sore thumb. Which is the problem they face here. Identifying Jews is a little more challenging, but that does not stop antisemitism. There was a very interesting article that interviewed Asian American Jewish leaders , asking them to share their experiences. |
| I never thought about being Asian and Jewish! But that explains the Chinese Kosher restaurant in Queens I used to go to when I was a teenager. I couldn't figure out why there was such a thing, but the food was so delicious I never gave it any more thought. Until now, when I realize Asian Jews must have run it. |
| I appreciate that food, and people, get "Americanized" over here, but what did you think about authentic Chinese food? |
| It's very different from American Chinese food, but both are delicious! They each have their own unique characteristics and flavors, and although very different, I appreciate them both, and there will always be a place for each in my culinary world! |
| Just as there should be a place for "different" people … |