Words & Banter

Insight From A Volleyball Mom

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DISCLAIMER AND WARNING: I'm a proud volleyball mom. Black knows this. And, I suspect, she tolerates it most of the time, although that's not to say she isn't proud of her youngest niece. But for those proud moms and dads out there, and those around you, you know we can sometimes over exaggerate our kid's accomplishments. (Wait, really? We do that?) Guess what. There may be something we're overlooking. Something many parents are overlooking …


So, Black and I are in the midst of updating this site with our 2020 monthly newspaper columns from earlier in the year and she sends me our March column, RED & BLACK … Leaders All Around Us, to proof. I hadn't read the column since it was initially published, and it's all about leadership and the skills that leaders possess which makes me think about my daughter, Sawyer. Yes, I think she has great technical skills as a setter. (Remember, I warned you about being a proud volleyball mom.) But re-reading the column made me realize that her skills as a leader is what distinguishes her and greatly contributes to her success, not just on the court but in life.

I'd be happy to bore you with examples, but Black would no doubt take out her electronic red pencil and delete it from this post. And right about now, I know she's thinking, "Is there a point to this post?" Well, it's this … leadership skills are all around us, including in our children. We love our kids so much that it's easy to get wrapped up in their tangible accomplishments. Or, sometimes we neglect to see that not all accomplishments are obvious. As one parent to another, I'm hoping that if you don't already see your kids as the leaders they may already be, that you think of them as the leaders they may have the ability to become.

Design by Sawyer Pennington, Underlying photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

Remember summer reruns on TV? Well, this month’s column is a first … it’s a “rerun” of our July 2020 column, except we added the word “CRITICAL” in the title. Because, four years later, we feel it’s very sad (and scary) that our sentiments about our country’s leaders having the strength, courage, and conviction to be independent thinkers are still relevant (maybe even more than before). So, the Fourth of July may be behind us, but Election Day will be here before you know it.



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I keep forgetting to ask you, since Sawyer is away at camp, what did you do for July 4th?



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Well, it was a very different Fourth of July. No kids. No barbeque. No fireworks.


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I know most of the fireworks were cancelled, but is your barbeque grill broken?


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No, this year I decided to declare my "independence" from doing a big holiday grocery shop, major prep work, and cooking outdoors in Texas heat.


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I wish there were more people willing to declare their independence.



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Somehow I don't think you're talking about me making an easy pasta dish in the comfort of my air-conditioned house vs. standing over a hot barbeque on a hot day.
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How you celebrate July 4th may change from year to year (Red will still enjoy a quiet holiday, but this year will be reading as it may take all summer to get through “War and Peace”), but what should never change is remembering WHY (one of Black’s favorite words) we celebrate as well as the sacrifices made to live in a free country …



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This is going to be a very unusual July 4 th for me, with neither girl being home. Natasha always hated the fireworks, but Sawyer would insist we do all the traditional things – barbequing, lots of watermelon, and then watching the fireworks in the Texas heat and humidity. So, this year, I plan to make it a really “cool” holiday … staying in the air-conditioned house, watching a movie or one of my TV series, and celebrating my day of independence from any “mom” responsibilities with a big bucket of freshly popped popcorn!


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Well, everyone celebrates differently. But, when I think of Independence Day, I think about the challenges our Founding Fathers faced when they drafted the Declaration of Independence , especially as they did not always agree on issues. Challenges our nation continues to face (it is a holiday, so I will not get into the increasingly divisive aspects of politics). And, I cannot help but wonder how many people realize the extent of the sacrifices made by those who signed it in exchange for our country’s freedom. Which is why, as we celebrate July 4th, we need to remember,
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
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What do you get when you cross Flag Day (June 14) with June being Effective Communication Month? Well, if you include Black in the mix, you get one of Red’s favorite memories … and a unique way to think about the importance of communicating – whether in your personal or professional life. And especially if you’re in a racecar!


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This past weekend, I noticed a bunch of flags on my street and wondered why since July 4 th is still almost a month away. But this morning, I learned that today's Flag Day.


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Well, for someone who likes to decorate for the holidays, I would have thought you would have known all about it.


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I've heard of it, but I never really thought much about it, let alone when it is. I knew it had to do with the American flag, but it surprised me that it has nothing to do with Betsy Ross, which legend has made the first flag, although it seems there's no evidence to support that.


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If you want an interesting "story", read about why the American flag is called Old Glory . Regardless, the American flag, like all flags, communicates a message.


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I know you like to connect odd dots, but only you would see a connection between flags and communications.
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