It was bad enough that we couldn't take our mom for her traditional Mother's Day lobster dinner at The Palm (although we never celebrate it on the actual day as restaurants are too crowded). Thanks to the pandemic, restaurants were either closed or take-out only. Given our mom is in her 90s and has pre-existing conditions, she was distancing herself from the rest of the world and basically secluded at home. (Something, by the way, she's definitely not happy about.)

We never dreamed, however, that …


six months later we'd have to forego her November birthday celebration, which is the same lobster dinner at the same restaurant. Clearly for our Mom, going out to dinner at a nice restaurant with her daughters has always been a special treat and something she looks forward to (or maybe it's just the lobster). While, for Red, going out to eat used to be a fun and relaxing escape from cooking at home, now it's a risk-reward decision filled with anxiety and stress. And always the same decision, "Not worth it." For Black, it's always been a "social thing" as she's had a long-standing (decades long!) Saturday night date with her best friends, John and Diana. Now, they visit over the phone and laugh about how much lower their AmEx bills are every month.

From a strictly pragmatic perspective – How do you maintain social distancing from anyone not in your household when you go out to eat? Obviously, you have to take off your mask to eat and drink (although there are masks that accommodate straws). Is it even feasible to go out to eat with people not in your "personal bubble"? Climate and weather permitting, how safe is it to eat outdoors?

But it's the emotional implications that make it so difficult. We're now in the midst of what Red calls the "silly season" where dining out and holiday parties have always been such a big part of celebrating the season. The pandemic has been with us for almost a year and we just want a break. A holiday break. So, now what?

The answers will be different for everyone, as we all have our own way of looking at risk-reward. Most of us are already struggling with holidays that are celebrated with food, family, and friends. Maybe if we focus on the holiday spirit, recognizing we're all facing the same challenges, and try to keep things in perspective, knowing next year will be better. And mix in a little humor …

Got your mask? Check. Have your battle plan ready. Check. Ready to keep distance. Check. Going into battle? No, just going out to eat.

P.S. – For those of you wondering about Mom's lobster dinners, we did a belated take-out for her Mother's Day dinner and she said it was the best lobster she had ever eaten. Full stop. And she's looking forward to the birthday dinner. Maybe, it is just the food.

Photo by Dave Bolton on iStock

It's a little thing – just three letters – that can make a big impact. At least, it has for Red. Ok, that may sound like a bit of an exaggeration. But the reality is that once "discovered", it can be used in many ways that you may wonder how you ever lived without it.

For Red, it all began years ago when she turned to Black looking for time management advice, and Red, in her usual fashion, could have kept the email stream going on and on (rather ironic given the topic). Black, running out of patience, but knowing that Red can be overly sensitive (trust us, that's an understatement), simply ended her email with "EOM."

Black figured that would get a response but hoped it'd ultimately reap long-term benefits. As expected, Red was clueless about what "EOM" stood for, not even sure whether it was an acronym, abbreviation, or technical term, so when she questioned Black, she called it "alphabet soup", although she was pretty certain the "M" stood for money …

EOM = End of message. Internet slang so that emails or IMs or text messages do not go on needlessly. If used properly, they can increase productivity so you do not continue to babble back and forth. If it used in the subject line, it means the message does not even have to be opened; i.e., there is no message other than the subject line.

Even with her love of blah-blah-blah, Red immediately "got it", loved it, and agreed that EOM made a lot of sense, so immediately started using it. Not only with Black, but with other people, who, she discovered, started using it.

So, now that you've read this post, all we can say is … EOM.

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Did you know that April's Autism Awareness Month? I wasn't aware (pun intended) of it until I read our local homeowner's monthly newsletter and it caught my eye.


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Actually, last month the founding organization, the Autism Society, changed "Awareness" to "Acceptance" to foster inclusivity, as knowing about something is very different from accepting it. But I am guessing that is not the point of this call.


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Although it isn't autism, it reminded me of years ago when we found out that Natasha has learning disabilities.


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I think you mean DIFF-abilities.


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Of course, that's another thing I remember. I was focused on the negative aspects of her diagnosis until you asked me, point-blank, "Why are they called disabilities?" And proceeded to explain that everyone has different strengths and weaknesses.


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Exactly! Imagine the world if everyone excelled at math, but flunked English. Or, a world of lawyers, but no musicians. Some people are better at social skills, while others excel at handling technical data. Why not just say that people who have different skillsets and abilities have DIFF-abilities versus making them feel like they have shortcomings?
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Design by Sawyer Pennington, Underlying photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash


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Well, the Oprah interview with Prince Harry and Meghan Markle was over a month ago, but I still see plenty of articles about it. It's really "stirred up" things in the Royal Family.


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Well, I guess it put "a bee in the royal bonnet." Although, I would not believe everything you read. Right after the interview, I read several articles suggesting the monarchy should end with Queen Elizabeth. I cannot imagine that happening.


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Oh, that isn't anything new. It's been going on for a long time; there was even talk of it when I lived in England decades ago. All the interview did was further encourage those who are already advocating it.


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At the risk of sounding like a broken record, but as I said in our Banter Bite, Talk About Getting The Royal Treatment, the Royal Family does seem to have "issues" in terms of race relations and dealing with mental illness. I can understand why people are questioning whether the monarchy, with its "old-fashioned" traditions and beliefs, is still relevant.


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But it's not like that's the only place those issues exist. Just pick up a newspaper, turn on the news – it's everywhere! Unfortunately, the Oprah interview put a very public face on it – The Royal Family, or The Firm, which is how the family and institution refers to itself.


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Who nicknames themselves The Firm? It sounds like a Netflix series, but with less class than " The Crown."
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