Banter Bites

Talk About Email Overload!

And Red thinks she receives a lot of emails from her sister, Black. Well, that's nothing compared to the approximately 1,000 emails a day that Dr. Fauci received during the height of the pandemic.

BANTER BITE BACKSTORY: The release of thousands of pages of Dr. Fauci's emails has generated a remarkable amount of media coverage, each putting their own "spin" on it (has anyone compared it to the Pentagon Papers yet?) and, of course, Red sees things very differently than Black.

Red, the straight-A- student, knew there was no way she'd read through the mountain of emails made available through the Freedom of Information Act but was curious what all the fuss was about. It didn't take long, whether just through scanning the headlines or watching a few video clips, to see that there were a handful of key take-aways. But her theater degree kicked in when Red wondered if an alien from another planet appeared (well, UFOs have been in the news lately), if they would think Dr. Fauci was a celebrity scientist given his cult status or a political traitor specializing in scientific espionage.

Regardless, Red couldn't help but wonder (out loud to Black) why any of us "mere mortals" would feel compelled to read through such an enormous volume of emails. And, Black's response?

Remember the word problems we did in school? Here is a new one … if the average email Dr. Fauci received consisted of 100 words, which would be relatively short and to the point (this paragraph contains 67 words), and it takes two minutes to read 500 words, how many hours would it take to read 4,000 emails? Yes, the answer can be calculated, but who cares?

Well, if nothing else, Black's approach to things is consistent – pragmatic and sarcastic. And Dr. Fauci's also consistent. From the smattering we've seen, his emails "read" like he comes across on TV – humble, logical, unemotional, and polite. But, just as would be expected if culling through thousands of someone's emails, some may be interesting, but most would probably be boring. Of course, Black can't help but mention another thing to consider,

Remember when you were going through your "crisis" and I was explaining some financial topic to you, and I declared that, "You are my best student. Ever." Technically that statement was accurate, although, at that point, you were also my only student. So, there is no way to know if quotes from the emails have been taken out of context without going back to the source documents. And, personally, I have much better things to do with my time.

Black certainly brings up an excellent point. We all have more important things to do than spend our weekends on electronic gizmos, so we respectfully request that you stop reading this … and find something more important to do …

This is one of Red’s favorite Banter Bites in large part because of Black’s “corny” puns, but also because fresh corn is a summer staple – whether cooked on the grill or in the microwave, whether eaten on its own or as a primary ingredient in refreshing summer salads


This may be one of the corniest things you’ll ever read.

BANTER BITE BACKSTORY: It’s just a vegetable, so how can it possibly elicit such a strong reaction from Red, while, for Black, it’s more a source of amusement and even, it turns out, admiration?

Keep Reading ...Show less

Think you can avoid artificial intelligence? Think again …

BANTER BITE BACKSTORY: Red already fights technology at every turn, preferring to keep her ostrich head in the sand, plus, she finds Artificial Intelligence (AI) scary; whereas Black knows ignoring reality merely postpones the inevitable, so she’s started playing with AI to understand it better …

Keep Reading ...Show less

A man better known for his death than his life, although Red, the straight-A student and history lover, immediately thinks of the costly and controversial movie of his life. (Well, technically, it was the life of Cleopatra.) Black, of course, focuses on business – leadership lessons, including the power of words, although she surprises Red with some food trivia. But the fact July’s named after him is the perfect excuse to rerun one of Red’s favorite Banter Bites …

Quick! If someone says "Julius Caesar," what comes to mind?

BANTER BITE BACKSTORY: Almost everyone has heard of Julius Caesar, but how many of us really know much about him, or at least that's what Red starts to wonder when she receives the usual flippant, but still accurate, reply from her sister, after feeling very proud that she knew that July was named after the famous Roman.

Keep Reading ...Show less