Ask Red & Black

My grandmother mentioned having a milkman. Did you have one?


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Funny you should ask, as I was recently getting ready for a garage sale of our mom’s things and came across an old metal carrying basket that I think is for milk bottles. Although my memory of our milkman is that he left the milk bottles in a small rectangular metal box outside our front door.

Anyway, my best memory of fresh milk, especially chocolate milk, was going to Dairy Barn with our dad. It was a drive-through; we’d return the old bottles, get our deposit back, and pick up new ones. I have to admit that when my mom started to get milk at our local Waldbaum’s (anyone growing up on Long Island will remember them) in paper cartons, I thought it was a little sad. Plus, I didn’t think the milk tasted as good.

Recently, when I saw some old-fashioned milk bottles from 1836 Farms at my local Kroger, although it was more expensive, I bought one just because it reminded me of my youth. In fact, when I initially told Black I wasn’t sure I wanted to spend that much on milk, she suggested I could reuse the bottle as a vase. And it always makes me smile!


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Since you mentioned your grandmother, which makes me feel old, you may have to ask her to explain what we meant when we teased Red, a redhead in a family of brunettes, of being the “milkman’s daughter”.

Looking back, “milkmen” and dairy delivery services were ahead of their time. They delivered milk as well as other dairy products, and seem to be a precursor to Instacart, Amazon Fresh, and all the food delivery services. Not to mention, it was a way to reuse the glass milk bottles (remember, this was decades before recycling was a “thing”).

Regardless, when we taught at KIPP Houston High School, I asked our students if they had ever heard of a milkman. (Most had not.) And then (of course), I followed up with an assortment of other questions … Can jobs become obsolete? What creates new opportunities? Do you think there may be jobs in the future that no one has ever heard of yet? What can you do to be prepared? So, if nothing else, I hope the milkman makes you stop and think …

FULL QUESTION: Asking Again: I love how Red & Black is run by two sisters. Is one of you “the boss”?

We thought this would be the perfect question to rerun on National Boss’s Day. Why? Well, we think the responses below say it all …



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Oh yes, definitely! Without question, that would be Black. In fact, on more than one occasion, I've been known to refer to her as The Boss (and I'm not talking about Bruce Springsteen). It's usually me kidding around and saying something along the lines of "I'll have to check with The Boss." (Even my daughters have heard me refer to their aunt that way, and they've never questioned me, so there must be some agreement, at least in my family, about who's the boss.)

To a great extent, it may be because if you were to compare our bios, I don't think my background as a mom prepared me to be a businesswoman, although Black has tried to convince me otherwise. On the other hand, Black's bio makes it painfully obvious she's "all business" so better suited to be "the boss."


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It depends on how you define "boss." If you are referring to who owns more of the company, I hold 1% more than Red, which technically means I have more"authority". And, I will admit that as the older sister, I have more practice being bossy (especially as she has always tried to avoid conflict), but when it comes to business, I value teamwork. Red has a perspective and background very different than mine (that is an understatement!), but the key is acknowledging that – and learning from one another in order to make the best business decisions.

The bottom line is there would be no Red & Black … without Red or without Black. It is truly a partnership.

Familiar with the saying, "It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity”? Well, with unbearably hot temperatures around the country, does it really matter which it is? Or even if it’s both?! Which is why this older “Ask Red & Black” is still relevant



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I'm laughing because I suspect Black would argue that I rarely look "nice" in the sense that I rarely "dress up". Even before the pandemic, unless I had a Red& Black business meeting or speaking engagement, my normal "look" was that of super comfy – workout or very casual clothing and minimal makeup. Here in Texas, where the heat and humidity are oppressive, I'm always looking for tips because the moment you step outside, you're going to start sweating, your makeup will drip, and your hair will either frizz or wilt (neither's a good look for me). So, I keep my skincare simple and summer-friendly – extremely lightweight, tinted facial moisturizer with a high SPF (so I only need a single product) and waterproof mascara.

I've never been very creative when managing my long hair for the summer, but my daughter let me in on a secret when she straightened my hair for me. Unlike my rushed approach, she took an extra 10 minutes to do it in smaller sections, which looked great when my hair was down, but amazingly, even made my ponytail look "finished". Taking a little more time to do it right makes a huge difference, as now my hair stands up to the heat and humidity. (Good news is she's always willing to do it for me, bad news is that she goes to college in a few months, so I'll have to learn how to do it myself.)


Black's HeadBlackassets.rebelmouse.io


When I started racing cars in the mid-1990s, I cut my hair very short so I could easily style it with some water and hair goo when I removed my helmet, which makes it perfect for summer. (Plus, I calculated that I could save over 10 hours/week, or five full days a year, by not dealing with my hair.)

In terms of clothing, it is a function of where you are going or where you work (obviously, if you are in the banking industry, you will dress very differently from someone who works for a design or marketing firm). For the last few decades, I have worn the same "uniform" – dark slacks or jeans, white shirt, blazer, and colorful Hermès shawl. In the summer, I select pieces that are light-colored, loose-fitting, and breathable fabrics, but if I had to give one tip, it would be to wear layers since going in and out of air-conditioning can be a challenge, although I see it as a fashion opportunity. In fact, that is how my "signature" shawls started as, regardless of the season, I would always have one with me to handle changes in temperature.

March is Women’s History Month, so what better time to reflect on how women can inspire other women to do amazing things? We’re rerunning a Q&A from a few years ago because celebrating women’s accomplishments is worth repeating and rereading … And it shouldn’t happen only in March!

P. S. – Betty White made this list, but how many of these trailblazing women do you recognize?


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Even with two daughters, and a sister who has been a role model for them and other girls (at speaking engagements, girls and boys are always surprised to learn she was the first woman to race the road course at Indianapolis Motor Speedway), it wasn’t until last year that I learned there even was a Women’s History Month. (Which is embarrassing as I claim to love history.) But once I made it a point to not only take notice of stories of women in history, but also women making history (for example, Wally Funk), I realized there are so many inspirational women – you just have to look for their stories.


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It is the 21 st Century; we should not need a Women’s History Month to make sure that we remember and honor all the contributions and accomplishments of women. (And, I will not get into my opinion of the word " herstory.”)

But, there are many great ways for us to celebrate. Find stories you find inspirational, and then share them with others. Donate (time or money) to an organization that helps women. Make an effort to support women-owned businesses. Or, maybe something as simple (and as enjoyable) as listening to your favorite female artists and musicians, reading female authors, or watching movies about strong independent women.