Chapter 15: I Need A Warning System
It’s easy to forget that charity is a year-round event, not just for the holiday season or when natural disasters happen. Since today’s International Day of Charity – Red couldn’t help but remember when Black explained her long-time involvement with Make-A-Wish (see below) … and realizing that helping others might end up being one of the best things you can do. For others. For yourself.
Typically, when Red asked Black questions, she received questions in return. Or flippant comments. When Red asked her about charity, and specifically Make-A-Wish, she got straight answers, and that alone got Red’s attention. Before this conversation, Red thought her sister’s involvement with Make-A-Wish was very generous, both of her time and her money, but attributed much of it to the fact she had surpluses of both in her life. But once Black made her realize that her involvement went back to her corporate life, years when she might have had spare money but was working ridiculous hours, Red gained a new respect for Black’s commitment. But when Black said how it had become her “reality check” on life, Red began to understand that we all need something to help us remember what’s genuinely important.
P.S. – Charity and helping others remain an important part of our lives (and, much to the chagrin of our accountants and attorneys, drive much of our work in the education and criminal justice worlds). Black’s long-time commitment to Make-A-Wish set an example for Red’s daughters when they were growing up, and made them aware of how important it is to not only appreciate what you have but to think of others. And whether it’s an ongoing commitment to a single organization, helping various charities throughout the year, celebrating targeted donation days (such as #GivingTuesday or World Wish Day), or when specific natural disasters or humanitarian needs require immediate aid, charitable giving (whether money or time) – can make all the difference. Not only to the recipient, but as Black pointed out to Red all those years ago, for yourself.
| I’m curious about something, though. As children, we were never exposedto charity, so what got you involved with Make-A-Wish? Even Natasha has askedme about Make-A-Wish, because she has seen the kids’ artwork at your house andrecognizes the logo from seeing it on your race car. |
red headassets.rebelmouse.io | It was years ago. I was invited to play in a Make-A-Wish golftournament, and at the dinner some of the kids came out and told their Wishstories. They mentioned their illnesses and the doctors and the hospitals inpassing — as if it was just a minor detail in their stories. But when theytalked about their wishes, it was with such excitement and pure happiness thatit was overwhelming. A few weeks earlier, I had received a huge bonus at workand so I was feeling flush with cash, and when I saw the power of a wish — thehope, the joy, the strength it could provide — it made me look at money in atotally different way. When you meet children who are seriously ill and yourealize no amount of money can “fix the problem,” but yet something as simpleas wishing for a puppy or to meet a celebrity can make such a huge differencein their lives, then you are reminded of what is really important in life. Andwhat is not. |
| Wow. I don’t think I have ever heard you thispassionate about anything. |
| Probably not. Make-A-Wish has been an importantpart of my life for a long time. I know I am very fortunate in many respects,but sometimes I get wrapped up in day-to-day life and forget that. I may haveproblems with one of the cars, or I am annoyed with Larry, or it is just a badday, Make-A-Wish reminds me that my problems or frustrations are minuscule inthe scheme of things. |
| Thisis a side of you that I rarely see. I’m impressed. And proud. |
| Thanks,but Make-A-Wish does far more for me than I do for them. Partly as a substitutefor not having children of my own, but more importantly as my reality check onlife. It is my constant reminder of what is important. And although I may notbe able to cure the kids, the fact I can make their lives a little better byhelping grant wishes is the least — the very least — I can do in return. |
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WHERE DO I START?
The last thing Red wanted to think about when she was in the midst of her crisis was her long-term goals and purpose. Her dreams had just been shattered, and the future was a dark and distant blur. She was barely getting through the day. She’d worry about tomorrow tomorrow. But once things started to settle down, she decided she was ready to think about tomorrow, and the days after that.
HERE’S ONE THING …
Red, like most of us, plans by starting with today. Black encouraged Red to try a different approach. Why not start with the end in mind? Start with what you want your life to look like, and work backward. Black’s Backward Planning Worksheet helps you think about where you want to be rather than where you are now – so you can plan how to get there.
THERE’S SO MUCH MORE!
Having direction in your life will change the way you look at things. It’s the difference between just driving around and driving with purpose. Knowing there’s more than one road to your destination lets you step back and ask yourself, “Am I making good decisions today that keep me pointed in the right direction?” If you aren’t, you make changes. Because life is a journey, not a destination, we created THE BIG PICTURE.
WHERE DO I START?
When a crisis hits, it’s devastating. There’s no sugar-coating it. You ask yourself, why me? Why now? When it happened to Red, she felt like her whole life was collapsing. Her emotions were all over the place, jumping from fear to anger to sadness, mixed with feeling lost and alone. The more she thought about it, the worse it all seemed.
HERE’S ONE THING …
When something bad happens, we just want it to be a bad dream and wake up to how things used to be. We can’t change the past, but we can change our mindset to focus on what we can control. (Not sure you can? Check out Black’s A Control Freak’s Approach To Crisis Management – an amusing but thought-provoking multiple choice questionnaire.) When we do, we make situations better for ourselves and the people around us, as it gives us the focus and confidence we need to get through it.
THERE’S SO MUCH MORE!
We all react differently. What one person sees as a crisis may not be seen the same way by someone else, but that doesn’t make it any less of a crisis to the person experiencing it. The one constant is needing the confidence in yourself and the support of others (no one should face a crisis alone) to make it through to the other side. We created **IT HAPPENS in the hope it will help you, and the people you care about, get through a crisis.