A year ago, we wrote about autism, including our thoughts on disabilities (or what Black refers to as “DIFF-abilities”). But we’ve always felt strongly about treating people with respect and a desire to better understand their individual situations rather than making assumptions. Autism is a spectrum disorder, and each person has different strengths and challenges. But can’t that be said of all of us?
| Did you know that April's Autism Awareness Month? I wasn't aware (pun intended) of it until I read our local homeowner's monthly newsletter and it caught my eye. |
| Actually, last month the founding organization, the Autism Society, changed "Awareness" to "Acceptance" to foster inclusivity, as knowing about something is very different from accepting it. But I am guessing that is not the point of this call. |
| Although it isn't autism, it reminded me of years ago when we found out that Natasha has learning disabilities. |
| I think you mean DIFF-abilities. |
| Of course, that's another thing I remember. I was focused on the negative aspects of her diagnosis until you asked me, point-blank, "Why are they called disabilities?" And proceeded to explain that everyone has different strengths and weaknesses. |
| Exactly! Imagine the world if everyone excelled at math, but flunked English. Or, a world of lawyers, but no musicians. Some people are better at social skills, while others excel at handling technical data. Why not just say that people who have different skillsets and abilities have DIFF-abilities versus making them feel like they have shortcomings? |
| I know that you completely changed my way of thinking, not only about Natasha but about the concept of "disabilities" full stop. It opened my eyes – and my brain – about how just because someone has challenges or limited abilities in some areas, that doesn't mean they don't have different gifts and strengths in other areas. |
| Exactly. Although autism is a "spectrum condition" meaning it affects people differently and to varying degrees, it is a complex developmental disorder that can affect a person's social skills, and ability to communicate and interact with others. However, autistic people usually possess some extremely valuable traits that are rare in non-autistic people. |
| Which is why it frustrates me that so many people feel like those with disabilities, excuse me DIFF-abilities, are "lesser" people. When Natasha was diagnosed, she was in her teens and already had a very strong personality (no doubt inherited from you) and, luckily, seemed to have an innate understanding that she was just different, not better, not worse, than others. I guess one of the biggest challenges is to get others to see things with the same mindset. |
| We are a story-telling society, and there are countless stories of people with DIFF-abilities, including those with autism, that are eye-opening and more powerful than anything we could ever say. |
| Funny you say that, as I was curious to learn more about autism and found some inspiring quotes (including a wonderful Tom Hanks clip) that not only gave me great insight but made me smile. One of my favorites was how Paul Collins, an author and parent of an autistic child, said, "Autists are the ultimate square pegs, and the problem with pounding a square peg into a round hole is not that the hammering is hard work. It's that you're destroying the peg." That's such a great way to describe not only those with autism but any disability. |
| Well, technically, it will fit, but it requires that the diameter of the circle be larger than the diagonal of the square. Basic geometry. But, I understand Paul Collin's point. |
| Talk about DIFF-abilities! Couldn't you just agree with me? |
| The thought never crossed my mind. |
| We’ve been posting new content on our website multiple times a week for what seems like forever, so it will be strange to only post a few times a month. |
| And, do not forget we also have been “feeding the beast” known as social media. But, if it makes you feel any better, we will still be issuing our newsletter every week and providing our followers with inside information on what the New Year will bring – a new website … and our new approach to Red & Black. |
| I’m so excited as it’s going to be fun, animated (in more ways than one), and help people take control of their lives vs. their life controlling them. Which, to some extent, is what we’ve always tried to do. |
| Yes, except our current site has almost too much information, and you do not know where to turn first. Or, where to go if you are looking for specific help. |
| I know when I first had my crisis, I turned to you, looking for you to tell me what to do. Instead, all I got was questions. Lots and lots of questions. But those questions were how you helped guide me. I think that’s why our book became a bestseller … because people could join me on my journey. |
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| And, it was formatted so they could follow along versus trying to find the information they needed somewhere in the hundreds and hundreds of posts on this site. In trying to provide useful information, we inadvertently overwhelmed people. |
| As if life isn’t overwhelming enough! That’s why I’m excited about our new approach, although some things will never change … like all your sarcasm and unusual perspectives. Not to mention all your racing analogies. |
| Or, at the risk of sounding warm and fuzzy, which is your area of responsibility, our commitment to try and help people. |
| Isn’t this where you usually mentionhow, for years, our lawyers and accountants tried to dissuade us from focusing on philanthropic endeavors? They were fine when Neiman Marcus launched our book, as it was intended as the basis of a sitcom, but then the detours began, and we went from our first speaking engagement into the education and criminal justice worlds. |
| Life never goes as planned. But, hopefully, the next few months will as we focus on our rebrand and our new site. |
| And creating posts every other Thursday on select topics and themes – whether it’s the start of the “silly season” (I still cannot believe pumpkin spice “everything” is already here) or just the daily challenges of life. So, are we going to post sneak peeks of what the new Red & Black world will look like? |
| Excellent question. |
| That's not an answer. |
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Then, I guess you will just have to wait and see
… |
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