Let me set the scene (keep in mind I was a theater major). The Houston area, where fur coats appear on the "ladies who lunch" when the weather dips below 50, has been hit by an unprecedented winter storm that not only brings snow and prolonged sub-freezing temperatures, but also creates statewide power outages for millions. My extremely pragmatic sister lives in a high-rise that lost power early in the storm and, thinking quickly, secures a hotel room in Houston's only five-star hotel, which just happens to be down the street from her place. Less than 24 hours later, I too lose power, but living in a house that has a fireplace, well-stocked pantry, and a gas cooktop, just hunker down. My car's parked on the driveway so I can easily access it to charge my gizmos, which also gives me the opportunity (or really, excuse) to warm up.
And it's there, while texting with Black (who, for the record, rarely texts but at that point in time it was the only form of communication that worked), that the following conversation ensues …
| Hotel lost power |
| Sorry! What are you going to do?! |
| Give it a few minutes – may be rolling blackout |
| Back on … was only off for a few minutes … maybe room has energy conservation setting since I had not moved |
| Ok, not as funny as pink utility bills but amusing nonetheless |
So, you may be wondering, why did I find this amusing and what do pink letters have to do with anything? Well, I'll start with the pink letters …
Years ago, when we were teaching a personal finance and Life 101 class at KIPP Houston High School, Black wanted the high school seniors to understand how having money's different from being smart with money. She explained how she kept receiving mail from her electricity provider that had those clear "windows" where she could see a pink letter inside. However, she ignored them because she typically paid her utility bills months in advance, so assumed they were part of a breast cancer awareness campaign.
All was good … until everything in her high-rise went, no pun intended, black. She assumed it was a power outage. Until she went out into the hallway and all the lights were on. Long story short, there had been an increase in her utility rate, so what she had paid months ago wasn't enough. Bottom line: my sister didn't pay her bill, and after sending her many "pink letter" past due notices, turned off her electricity.
So, what does this have to do with her hotel room going dark? Except for the obvious connection, actually, nothing. But it reminded me, whether she thought the hotel might be experiencing a rolling blackout or that the bills were fundraising for breast cancer, Black jumps to a "meaningful" reason for why something happens. It's typical Black. Logical and pragmatic but also looking for a bit more "meaning" to things. Which is fine, but it often makes me laugh (to myself, anyway) knowing that in reality the truth's often (actually, almost always) simpler and something us "mere mortals" easily see.
Sometimes it's best not to overthink or overanalyze …
| Did you know that April's Autism Awareness Month? I wasn't aware (pun intended) of it until I read our local homeowner's monthly newsletter and it caught my eye. |
| Actually, last month the founding organization, the Autism Society, changed "Awareness "to "Acceptance" to foster inclusivity, as knowing about something is very different from accepting it. But I am guessing that is not the point of this call. |
| Although it isn't autism, it reminded me of years ago when we found out that Natasha has learning disabilities. |
| I think you mean DIFF-abilities. |
| Of course, that's another thing I remember. I was focused on the negative aspects of her diagnosis until you asked me, point-blank, "Why are they called disabilities?" And proceeded to explain that everyone has different strengths and weaknesses. |
| Exactly! Imagine the world if everyone excelled at math, but flunked English. Or, a world of lawyers, but no musicians. Some people are better at social skills, while others excel at handling technical data. Why not just say that people who have different skillsets and abilities have DIFF-abilities versus making them feel like they have shortcomings? |
| I know that you completely changed my way of thinking, not only about Natasha but about the concept of "disabilities" full stop. It opened my eyes – and my brain – about how just because someone has challenges or limited abilities in some areas, that doesn't mean they don't have different gifts and strengths in other areas. |
| Exactly. Although autism is a "spectrum condition" meaning it affects people differently and to varying degrees, it is a complex developmental disorder that can affect a person's social skills, and ability to communicate and interact with others. However, autistic people usually possess some extremely valuable traits that are rare in non-autistic people. |
| Which is why it frustrates me that so many people feel like those with disabilities, excuse me DIFF-abilities, are "lesser" people. When Natasha was diagnosed, she was in her teens and already had a very strong personality (no doubt inherited from you) and, luckily, seemed to have an innate understanding that she was just different, not better, not worse, than others. I guess one of the biggest challenges is to get others to see things with the same mindset. |
| We are a story-telling society, and there are countless stories of people with DIFF-abilities, including those with autism, that are eye-opening and more powerful than anything we could ever say. |
| Funny you say that, as I was curious to learn more about autism and found some inspiring quotes (including a wonderful Tom Hanks clip) that not only gave me great insight but made me smile. One of my favorites was how Paul Collins, an author and parent of an autistic child, said, "Autists are the ultimate square pegs, and the problem with pounding a square peg into a round hole is not that the hammering is hard work. It's that you're destroying the peg." That's such a great way to describe not only those with autism but any disability. |
| Well, technically, it will fit, but it requires that the diameter of the circle be larger than the diagonal of the square. Basic geometry. But, I understand Paul Collin's point. |
| Talk about DIFF-abilities! Couldn't you just agree with me? |
| The thought never crossed my mind. |
| So, how do you plan to explain how our WORDS & BANTER section is different from BANTER BITES? Although it often takes more than a "bite" of sisterly banter to address topics, especially since we always seem to have very different perspectives. |
| You just explained it. |
| Do you think we should mention how, on the surface, it may appear as a hodge-podge? An assortment of topics. Things that don’t fit “nice and neat” in specific categories. |
| Areyou describing WORDS & BANTER? Or, life? |
| I should've known that you'd answer my question with a question. |
| How long have I been your sister? By now, you should be used to it. |
| True. Just like you should be used to my blah-blah-blah. |
| Which explains why we never have a shortage of words … or sisterly banter. |
| That, and the fact that you always seem to have a different point of view or perspective on any given topic. |
| We are sisters— not clones. |
| Well, sometimes I think you’re a Vulcan. Anyway, should we mention that if they want a weekly dose of Red & Black banter and perspective, they should sign up for our newsletter at the bottom of this page? |
| You just did. |
Red assets.rebelmouse.io 
Black assets.rebelmouse.io We love it when Passover, Good Friday, and Easter overlap. Yes, they’re very different celebrations, but they have a lot in common — tradition, history, family, and hope. And the post below is worth repeating, because we wish everyone could remember what we have in common instead of our differences …
| I can't tell you how much I love when Passover and Easter are close together. And this year, the last day of Passover falls on Easter! |
| They usually fall close to one another, and when the girls were young and celebrated everything (which many interfaith families do), it allowed me to be efficient in terms of gift-giving and celebration meals. |
| I'll never forget you adding fluffy Easter bunnies and pastel-colored eggs to a Zabar's basket of Passover goodies. But I wasn't really thinking about that. |
red headassets.rebelmouse.io | Let me guess. You want to use this as an opportunity to remind me – once again – that the Comparative Religion class you took decades ago at Wake Forest University was one of the best classes you ever took. |
| Fine, make fun of me. But that class was such an eye-opener. Before it, I thought there were huge differences between the religions. But the reality's very different. We have much in common. |
| Yes, a belief in something bigger than us, in faith, in traditions, in celebrations that go back centuries. |
| Exactly! And while people might celebrate different holidays based on their religion, when those holidays come close together it's a perfect reminder of what's truly important. Our fundamental values are so similar. If everyone could see that, maybe we'd be pulling together more and be torn apart less. |
| It is up to each of us to decide whether we want to focus on our differences or our similarities. |
| At this point, I'd settle for respect, tolerance, and understanding. |
| You left out world peace. Well, given that Passover and Easter both celebrate history … and hope … maybe your request is reasonable after all. |
| In that case, whether our readers are eating the last of the matzo or hunting Easter eggs, I think we should wish them a very happy holiday… one filled with hope, happiness, and peace. |
| You just did. |