Back in 2004, I met an older couple participating in a Ferrari rally, and after a deep conversation over a long lunch, they became dear friends. It was an event that would change my life in many ways, and several months later, shortly after my husband “surprised” me with a divorce, the husband sent me an email that so moved me that I put it in my “Blue Book”. (A Circa planner with a blue leather cover, hence the name, that includes not only my calendars but also a section with a few things I re-read on a regular basis.)
Last month, he passed away. I always made a point of letting them know that “Footprints” had become an important part of my life. They are words to live by. And, in honor of my dear friend, who is loved and missed, I want to share that email. With no edits … as we do not get to edit our lives …
In the spring of 1972 Sue and I had been married for 18 months and we were dissatisfied with our existence. After some serious soul searching we decided to make a radical change in our lives. Both of us had read a book by the author Louis Bromfield that rhapsodized about the joys of farm life. We were young and adventurous, and we did not realize that Mr. Bromfield was independently wealthy, he was in fact a famous Hollywood screenwriter and not even remotely dependent on farming for a living.
We sold all of the extras that we had accumulated such as our house, my AA Fuel Dragster, Dragster Trailer, and miscellaneous spare engine and associated parts, cashed in my life insurance and moved to a small farm in North Central Missouri twelve miles South of the community of Marshall. We had chosen that latitude carefully reasoning that the land around us needed to change as much as possible during the year if we were going to stay in one place all the time. Marshall, Missouri has four distinct and nearly equal seasons with a long Spring and Fall, a real contrast to the monotony of Houston, Texas. The first year of our Missouri residence we saw the temperature swing one hundred and thirty four degrees, from a high in late July of 106º to a low in January of 1973 of 28º below zero. The land changed around us indeed.
One of my real surprises was learning how much I liked cold weather. I had never really lived anywhere where it snowed very often. I was delighted when we had snows during the night that formed ice crystals in the surface so that when the sun came up in the morning the snow sparkled as if there there was a diamond studded white blanket draped across the fields.
One morning in that first winter I left the house early while I was waiting for the coffee to finish brewing. It had snowed about six inches during the night but dawn broke on a cloudless sky with the blue that only a cold clear morning sky has. I wandered with the rising sun at my back to the top of the closest ridge. When I reached the crest I could see before me a gently undulating pristine white scene with only the sounds of the early morning birds to keep me company. It was a glorious day.
After a few moments I turned to leave and there in the otherwise unbroken white lay a path of solitary footprints. Dumbstruck I realized that I was looking at a metaphor for my life, that each step that I had ever taken led precisely to where I was standing. I turned back around and looked at the future, unmarked waiting for my next footprint and I had an epiphany. If I wanted the footprints of the future to go in a certain direction, or to have a particular shape then it was up to me to make each individual step count. The footprints of the future would leave a history of my choices. That morning in the snow my life changed and I started the footprints that surely lead to where I am standing now.
In time I came to understand that each footprint was necessary to help me reach this moving destination, each misstep, each stumble, each mistake and fall, each heartache and all the joys have made me into the man I am today.
I don't regret a single one.
Drive carefully my friend, the future is before you, the footprints of the past cannot be changed.
| I know everyone’s always trying to find balance in their life. I thought becoming an empty nester would make that easier, but apparently not. The girls may be grown, but being a mom doesn’t end when your children move out. Between them, Red & Black, and my seemingly endless lists of things to do, I still struggle. | |
| And, as I am a die-hard workaholic who admits to not having a life, you think I have the answer? | |
| Excellent point. Never mind. | |
| However, I do have some suggestions … although I will preface it with, "Do as I say, not as I do." |
| At this point, I'll take whatever help I can get. | |
| Sometimes you need to make a conscious effort to stay present. And, by that I mean appreciate what is happening now instead of thinking about what is next. Or, reminiscing about the past. | |
| That sounds good, but it also sounds overly simplistic, not to mention highly optimistic. And where would I even start? | |
| Easy. It really is as simple as 1 – 2 – 3. | |
| Nothing's that simple. | |
| 1. SLOW down and look around 2. STOP using your gizmo and consider putting it away 3. GO spend time with family or friends, or steal some "alone time" | |
| Actually, that does sound simple. Now I just have to remember to SLOW – STOP –GO. | |
| Just imagine a traffic light. Plus, it would have the added benefit of every time you see a real traffic light, it will remind you to SLOW –STOP – GO. | |
| I should've known there'd be a car or driving analogy in there somewhere. | |
| Throttle on ... |
Never underestimate the difference one person can make. For Black, one extraordinary Make-A-Wish leader proved it — not only by transforming an organization, but by inspiring everyone around her. Black included. This was originally posted in 2022, but bears repeating …
| I know that you’ve been involved with Make-A-Wish for decades, and it’s an amazing organization, but I’m not sure why you made such a big deal about the recent Texas Gulf Coast & Louisiana chapter’s dedication of its building. I appreciate that you were part of the planning group, but with all due respect, it’s just a building. |
| I don’t expect you to remember that it all started in 1980 when Tommy Austin wanted to do something special for a young boy, Chris Greicius, who was battling leukemia and wanted to be a policeman. That wish became a reality and the start of The Make-A-Wish Foundation. |
| That story has always inspired me as it makes you realize the difference that just one person can make. But the building wasn’t named after Chris or Tommy, so I’m still confused. |
| You just said it yourself. Because one person CAN make a difference. The building is now officially named afterTeresa “Teri” Andrepont because when she was hired as President and CEO, our chapter was a fledgling organization — not only struggling financially, but its future was uncertain. Fast forward 29 years to when Teri retired, and we were one of the most successful chapters in the nation, maybe the world. |
| Wow, talk about a dedication being made because of one individual’s incredible dedication. Pun intended! But it helps that Make-A-Wish is such a well-known and highly respected charity, although I realize that might not have been the case when she started. Regardless, it gave her the opportunity to have a wonderful career. |
| I joined the Board not long after she was hired and have been involved ever since. This was not a career for Teri — but a passion and personal commitment. She was more than a leader; she was a visionary. She not only saw the power of a wish, but also how Make-A-Wish could be an important part of the community. And, it was contagious. |
| I’ve always wondered where your passion for Make-A-Wish came from. |
| It may have started at a golf tournament benefiting Make-A-Wish, but it was Teri’s passion and unwavering dedication that made us all want to do everything we could to support her. |
| OK, I know it’s an understatement to say you have a strong personality, but I can’t help but wonder if there were ever times you disagreed with Teri or wanted to suggest different ways of doing things. |
| I never have a shortage of ideas or suggestions. Or even questions. What I always respected about Teri is she would hear me out (and vice versa), and I knew she always did what she genuinely felt was best for the chapter. But, as you have heard me say many times, many roads can take you to your final destination. |
| Oh yes, I have. And clearly, yours and Teri’s goal was the same … to make the chapter as successful as possible and to grant as many wishes as possible. |
| Exactly. At first, it meant getting the chapter out of debt. I will never forget the Board meeting when Teri was concerned that she could not meet payroll. And, we only had a few employees. I remember that every time I look at our financials, and although we are on solid footing, it is important to remember our humble beginnings and what it took to get here. |
| Looking at the chapter now, it’s hard even to imagine things were ever that dire. |
| I know. But, that is because of Teri. And, it did not happen overnight. As we grew, so did our need for more office space. We started in a small donated office in the west part of Houston, and later we bought a small home we called “the cottage” near the Medical Center. When we outgrew that, Teri found our current building, which was once an Ethan Allen furniture store. |
| I love the layout of that building and walking through it. Each different area tells stories of hope and joy, especially the “Bald is beautiful” wall. But I can’t imagine how you decide which wishes to feature. There must be thousands of them. |
| We are quickly approaching 10,000 wishes, of which 8,261 were granted under Teri’s leadership. But, there are 250 wishes that truly impress me. |
| Seriously? You keep track of that? |
| No. When we started working on the building dedication, I learned something new about Teri. During the 29 years she was our CEO and President, Teri and her husband, Jim, volunteered to grant 250 wishes. |
| So, that’s on top of everything else she did?! I think that says it all. |
| And, explains why the building is dedicated to her. So, do you still think it is just a building? |
P.S. – Watch the video in honor of the building dedication and decide for yourself. And if you're curious where Black's passion for Make-A-Wish started, click here.
Did you know that Saturday is National Garage Sale Day? (Yes, that’s a real thing.) But no matter the reason for a garage sale — whether to get rid of things you’re not using anymore, an attempt to declutter, or estate sale “leftovers” — they can be about so much more than just “stuff”. Something Red learned a few years ago when our mom passed ...
| Thanks for the accounting of your garage sale. But, given how many hours you spent preparing for it, and then the actual sale itself, did you calculate how much you “earned” on a $/hour basis? |
| No, all I know is that it seemed to take forever to go through everything in Mom’s house and decide what to keep, what to sell, what to donate. And what to trash. As far as the garage sale, I’ll give you your half the next time I see you. |
| Keep my half. You did all the work. I did not even offer to help. |
| And that was a big help. Thank you. |
| Obviously, you must be exhausted because you are making no sense. |
| Sorry, but I have a specific way of running garage sales, and the last thing I needed was another “cook in the kitchen”. |
| Not a good analogy, as “cook” is a four-letter word that I do not use. |
| Cute. But seriously, I knew if I had asked you to help, you would’ve. But I can only imagine how you’d have reacted when you first saw all the stuff for sale. Especially as I treat garage sales as a way to get rid of items that I know have very little value. I’m not trying to maximize the money I make; I’m just trying to make the stuff “go away”. In fact, I don’t even put prices on them. |
| That all makes sense. Except for not having everything pre-priced. That would drive me crazy. How do you know what to charge people? |
| It’s an experience thing and another reason why I didn’t ask you to help. I have a sense of prices, but not something I could quantify in advance. When someone arrives, I tell them that everything’s cheap and give them an example. They usually look at me like, “Wow, she means it.” And then I tell them to collect what they want and that I promise to give them a good price. And I do. |
| Is that why you and Mom never had joint garage sales? I cannot imagine she would let you determine prices on the spot. |
| Actually, she’s the one who “taught” me not to price things. That if someone picks up something or you see them looking at it, they’re interested. And that’s all you need to know. Where we differed was in how much to charge. To her, it was fun, but also a way to make money. To me, a garage sale isn’t my retirement account. It’s my way to get rid of stuff, especially big, bulky stuff. |
| In other words, people are paying you to haul off your trash. Or, save you trips taking stuff to your local thrift stores. |
| Exactly. Although I still take a lot of items to thrift stores that would probably sell for a decent price at a garage sale because I believe in what they’re doing, and I know that my donations make a difference. But I forgot how fun a garage sale can be, meeting people and laughing, just making connections, and knowing that someone will now enjoy and/or use your things. Or, in this case, Mom’s things. |
| Is there a particular age group that came to your garage sale? |
| It was truly a mix of people. Not counting the kids tagging along with their parents, which reminded me of when the girls would set up a lemonade stand to benefit Make-A-Wish at my garage sales years ago, they ranged from 20-somethings to senior citizens. But I’m almost afraid to ask why you asked. |
| I will not get into studies and statistics, but younger people are really into the environment and reusing older things, especially clothing (which is one of the three “new” R’s – reduce– reuse – recycle). So, garage sales, along with thrift stores, are becoming more popular than ever. |
| I love it! And the idea of so many of Mom’s things, now that she’s passed, will get to live on and be enjoyed by others. |
| At the risk of sounding like a MasterCard commercial, there are some things that money cannot buy. Like sentimental value and fond memories. |
| I know. Which is why the process of sorting everything was so time-consuming. Interestingly, when that came up in conversation during the garage sale, so many people could relate and then shared their own stories. It was as if they wanted me to know that Mom’s things were getting a good home. |
| Well, if you add that to the cash you made, it sounds like a very successful garage sale. Hopefully, the next sale, being an estate sale with larger and higher-priced items, will be as successful. And, although I tried to get you to use a professional “estate sale” company that would do everything for you, I am beginning to understand why you decided to do it yourself. |
| The hardest part was culling and organizing, and there was no way I’d let strangers go through all of Mom’s things. And the internet makes “advertising” the sale and posting items online very easy. All in all, there’s no reason we can’t do it ourselves. |
| We?! |
| Yes, because your ability to combine photos into a single image and correct my grammar is important. But your spreadsheets will be critical. |
| Now, that I can do. |


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