Photo taken by Red at Prison Break Tattoos


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I still can't believe that Sawyer actually did it. I thought it'd be something she'd talk about for a while.


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I never had a doubt. Once she mentioned it to me, it was obvious she had thought it through.


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Well, when I got Natasha her first tattoo as her high school graduation gift four years ago, the last thing I ever imagined was that I'd be giving Sawyer the same gift.


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That is because Natasha has "attitude" and an independent streak, so being the first in the family to get a tat was totally in keeping with her personality.


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No kidding! Whereas Sawyer's a hard-working student-athlete that graduated from high school with honors. She's very social, and her friends seem as "clean-cut" as she is. All-in-all, not the type you associate with tattoos.

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You are showing your age. And, stereotyping people. Maybe years ago, only a certain "type" of person got tats – criminals, gang-members, uneducated, rebellious. Now, they have become mainstream, and people who get tats demonstrate many positive traits.


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I know, and I thought I got over my preconceived notions when Natasha got her first tattoo and then started getting more. But it just seems so out-of-character for Sawyer.


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Really? Out of character for someone who is very creative and is working toward a career in the entertainment world? Someone who understands and appreciates the power of storytelling and the meaning of words and imagery? Someone who knows herself well enough to carefully select a tat that has a deep personal meaning?


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Since you put it that way, maybe it's not out-of-character. I guess no more so than you getting a tattoo that matched Natasha's first one and now Sawyer's.


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The one I share with Natasha is meaningful because it was my first tat and we share that. This one is meaningful because Sawyer came up with a very creative way to remedy a "challenge" that we share.


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Remarkably, it was only a few years ago that she told me that she has trouble knowing her left from her right. At first, I thought she was kidding, but then remembered you don't know your right from your left. But when she recently told me she wanted to get two tattoos, an "L" and an "R", to help her remember, I just laughed.


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And, when she told me that the other night, I told her I thought it was brilliant. Although, you clearly were no longer amused.


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That's because I realized she was serious. At one point, she had talked about getting an arrow tattoo as a reminder of her summers at camp, but it was only very recently that she mentioned the "L" and the "R." The idea of a tattoo started as "maybe, one day in the future." But the other night, it became "one day very soon" and yesterday it actually happened!


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It is human nature that you will always think of her as your little girl, but Sawyer is growing up and about to leave for college. This tat is the perfect graduation gift for her as it acknowledges that you trust her decision-making skills.


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I know that intellectually. But since it's something permanent, I just wanted to make sure that she wasn't having second thoughts. And that she understood it could lead to future tattoos since we've seen from Natasha how tattoos can become "addictive".


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Even I have told you that after the first one, I started thinking about getting inked again. However, it never dawned on me I might be "sharing" my second tat with Sawyer. And, at Prison Break, where I got my first one. But, I am thrilled it worked out that way.


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Which makes it even more special for her, too. So, I'm thrilled for both of you. Especially since both of you will finally know your left from your right.
Photo by chatiyanon on iStock

It seems the pandemic has resulted in people “recycling” relationships from their past, and I have already admitted to doing that and then being “ghosted” (the relationship was doomed the first go-round and trying to resurrect it reminded me of why). Although on the surface it may seem rude, there are a few “legitimate” reasons for ghosting, some less obvious than others.

Looking back to decades of dating, a handful of engagements, and two failed marriages, I realized none of them started as friendships. I will also admit that very few started with sparks of passion (I know those fizzle out), but all were analyzed in terms of compatibility. Too bad I was not aware of research indicating the majority of romantic relationships begin as long-term friendships.

This story began as an impromptu business meeting when I asked to speak to the manager of a food franchise I frequented, thinking there might be an opportunity to create a joint marketing opportunity with Red & Black. There was no way to know the attractive man sitting toward the back of the store, who I noticed when I first walked in, would be the district manager.

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Design by Sawyer Pennington, Underlying photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash


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I can’t believe it’s already May, which means hot and humid weather is just around the corner. All I can say is … ugh.


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Not a scientific term, but descriptive nonetheless. And, I hate to break the news to you, but the science of climate change and global warming means summers will keep getting hotter.


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I can remember growing up in New York and summers being hot, but not like now. Of course, it didn’t help that Mommy didn’t run the air conditioning until it got into the 90s.
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Photo by Epiximages on iStock


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I appreciate that bullet points may not be the typical approach to Mother’s Day, but it seems appropriate to me …
  • Be sensitive to those people whose mothers may no longer be with us, especially given how many have been lost to COVID
  • If you have lost a mother, remember they are always with you – in your heart and in your memories
  • Remember Mother’s Day also includes all those “unofficial moms” and “mother figures” who are like second (or replacement) moms
  • And, last but not least, If you’re a mom, try to enjoy the day by doing something for yourself, as today may be the one day you can get away with it


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This year I write about Mother’s Day with a heavy heart and still much raw emotion, as our mom passed in December. My pragmatic side (yes, that’s usually Black’s area although she did sound somewhat warm and fuzzy above) knows that she had been 94 and led a full life, but that really doesn’t make it any less sad or fill the emptiness. But I find myself, when I least expect it and triggered by the most unexpected things, finding comfort in wonderful memories. And although Black’s first bullet point hits too close to home for me, I’ll try my best to focus on the other bullets.

Wishing all moms a very Happy Mother’s Day!