Think of stuttering as foreplay for great conversation.
BANTER BITE BACKSTORY: Patience isn’t something that either of us possesses, and Black has been known to question whether it’s really a virtue; but when it comes to someone speaking, or more specifically, stuttering, it’s interesting (but not surprising) how they have very different reactions.
I am running out of patience with your blah-blah-blah. Can you get to the point?
No, that’s not how Black reacted to someone that stuttered, but it’s often how she feels in conversations with Red, and sometimes even tells her that. Because Black isn’t, well, the most patient of people and has been known to finish people’s sentences or interrupt them when she knows where they’re going and wants the conversation to move along quicker.
And then there’s Red … maybe a little more patient because she’s a little more, well, nice. But still, because of her love of the blah-blah-blah, she has a habit of not letting others get a word in edgewise.
So, imagine when coincidence (or was it?) recently led us to each encounter someone that stutters. For Red, it came when she was stressing out about having to possibly disassemble and dispose of a commercial-sized shuffleboard table in our mom’s house. She called a highly recommended company (LoadUp, if you’re curious, but this isn’t a paid ad) and was surprised to find that the customer service representative stuttered,
Something remarkable happened during that call. I went from being incredibly stressed out to being calm and in a good mood. Because as soon as I heard his stutter, I forced myself to “slow down” and just listen.
And Black? Well, it was when she was introduced to the two-man film crew at the taping of an interview for the dedication of the Make-A-Wish building, and assumed that the person who stuttered was the cameraman, not the interviewer, but when she realized her error,
Allowing the interviewer to ask his questions at his pace reminded me of the importance of listening to what he was saying before deciding how to answer. That it was not a race to the finish.
The timing of these two experiences so close together was one thing, but it happened around the same time that Black saw the latest release in the New York Times’s Adapt-Abilty series, a fascinating video, “I Stutter. But This Is What You’re Not Hearing,” with an important message …
The problem isn’t with the stutterer; it’s with the listener.
BANTER BITE BASICS
The intent was always to give two perspectives on any given topic — Red’s and Black’s. And some things will never change. But how we’ve formatted BANTER BITES has … and we see the value in providing both long and short versions.
BANTER BITE BACKSTORY
Everything with us is a story. Years ago, we were working with a branding company, and one of the team imagined us as cartoon characters. (Thank you, Puneet!) People told us they loved our sisterly banter, so we started doing a single-frame cartoon to introduce our monthly columns. Then we used them on slides at speaking engagements (Black’s corporate background taught her how BORING PowerPoint presentations can be, so she refused to have slides filled with words).
Then we modified them so each of us was in our respective environments — Red in the kitchen and Black in her office — and people suggested we syndicate them. (Black, of course, then researched syndication.) And we even used them at a pitch meeting with Hasbro. When we started working with an animation company and saw their version of our “creatures”, we decided they needed to be front and center.
Fairly early on, Black suggested to Red that we start a daily BANTER BITE that we could post on our website and also social media. It could be about something happening in our lives, current events, some obscure fact/study Black happened across, the list goes on and on …Red’s reply? (Keep in mind, she’s the self-proclaimed queen of blah-blah-blah.) “I’m not sure we’ll have enough material to be able to post every day.”
THE REALITY?
To make her point, Black started churning them out based on our conversations — and not only did it seem like there was something every day, but some days they just kept coming, and soon there was a huge backlog.
No, we didn’t publish them all, and we usually don’t post anything on our website on weekends (except for holiday wishes) because we strongly believe weekends shouldn’t be spent on gizmos, although that doesn’t stop Black from working. (FYI, our social media guru schedules posts on Sundays because that’s what the data supports, although we still think people should digitally disconnect on weekends.)
The feedback? Almost instantly,
People told us our BANTER BITES are fun and quick to read. But also relevant to their day-to-day lives – and not just on the day they’re published.
In other words, they didn't have an expiration date! Amazing, since in today's world of social media and constant news, even something from earlier in the day can be considered old or outdated.
FIXING WHAT WASN’T BROKEN
They started as a two-frame cartoon with a sentence or two below them. Then we were advised that, for SEO purposes (in other words, to “please” the online algorithms), we needed to have more words and key phrases. So, we expanded them.
Now, we realize there’s room for both. Some will be short and to the point, while on others we may have more to say (but you’ll have a “keep reading” option).
P.S. – If there’s a topic you want us to talk about, you can email us at Banter@RedandBlack.email.
Red started to write warm and fuzzy Christmas and holiday greetings, but Black said some things are worth repeating … like our simple Christmas post from 2023 (check out the movie clip) …
No matter what holiday you may celebrate, Red can’t help but quote a line from one of her favorite Christmas songs, “Have yourself a merry little Christmas. Let your heart be light. From now on, your troubles will be out of sight.”
And Black can’t help but point out that the song wasn’t introduced in a Christmas movie but in the movie "Meet Me In St. Louis."
Wishing you a merry everything and a happy always!
Sadie Hawkins Day … some may find it sexist. Some may find it inspirational. Others just nostalgic. Our take on it hasn’t changed since we first issued this post. But if you asked Black for a car analogy (she always has one), she’d tell you it’s about taking the wheel and leading the way …
Comic strip or reality show: A group of bachelors participates in a foot race, and whoever's caught by the single woman in the race will become her husband.
BANTER BITE BACKSTORY: We may be sisters, but except for growing up with the same parents in the same house in New York, that may be where the similarities end; especially in terms of dating "protocol" as Black never thought twice about asking boys (and later men) out on a date, while Red never gave it any thought, accepting the convention that boys did the asking. (She did make an exception for her senior prom but was shocked when he accepted.)
When it comes to Sadie Hawkins Day, we both agree it's a quirky holiday that makes it "acceptable" for girls to ask out boys, but of course, we have very different perspectives. For Red, it conjures up images of Sadie Hawkins Day dances, although she never went to one and doesn't even remember how she knows about them. While Black's fascinated by how it all began with the cartoonist Al Capp and his popular "Lil' Abner" comic strip and quickly became a pop culture phenomenon.
Now, over 80 years later, if you were to analyze Sadie Hawkins Day, you would probably find it outdated and sexist. But why not just laugh at its silly beginnings and enjoy the day. The funny thing is Red still thinks men should ask out women, while Black always believed that every day's Sadie Hawkins Day.