| Well, it seems I barely got the Thanksgiving decorations put away and I was putting out Chanukah menorahs. Which means the year's almost over. Where did it go? |
| You say that every year. But this year, I think everyone wants the year to be over. |
| Now there's an understatement! But I still love this time of year. I just wish I could enjoy it more, but I know that the days will just fly by. Chanukah comes mid-month and I'll barely be able to celebrate it before making sure that I'm prepared for Christmas and then New Year. |
| That is the holiday tradition, exhaust yourself getting "ready" for the holidays. Then, try your best to actually enjoy the holiday, which will be a challenge unto itself given the pandemic. And then, feel relief, and maybe a little sadness, when it is over. |
| You sound like a modern-day Scrooge. |
| If that were the case, I would have mentioned the people who go through the holiday season feeling overwhelmed, lonely, or even depressed. Which is probably more this year than usual. |
| You're not helping the situation. I'm already feeling overwhelmed. Between parenting, work, and managing the challenges of the coronavirus, the holidays just add more things to my already long to-do list with deadlines that can't slide. |
| Correct me if I am wrong, but I thought the holiday season was supposed to be about spending quality time with family and friends. A time of fun and joy. Of giving and sharing. Of hope. And, maybe even magical. And, yes, I appreciate that the pandemic will require being creative, but it can still be done. |
| What's going on? You're talking about feelings! You're supposed to be the pragmatic one. |
| No need to be concerned. Remember, I am the one who can talk about relationships and take emotions out of the picture. |
| Which always makes me laugh. You're truly the only person I've ever known who can use bullet points to explain relationships. |
| But, do they make sense? |
| Yes, but what does that have to do with the holidays? |
| Everything. Think about it. |
| I hate when you won't just answer my question. |
| No, you hate when I make you think. Do you remember the first bullet point? |
| Yes. It's about understanding your values and priorities – totally independent of the other person. But the holidays are about giving and sharing. They're about family and friends. Even you said that. |
| True. But, first you have to get back to basics and determine what is important to you. Otherwise, you get too wrapped up in all the details and forget the big picture. And, it is all the details which cause the stress and fatigue. |
| No kidding. Tell me about it. |
| One thing leads to another on your list. Then you start adding things you would like to do if you have the time, which somehow become things you feel you have to do. The next thing you know, you have totally unrealistic expectations. Layer on top the over-commercialization of the holiday season and you now are set up for failure instead of success. And, that does not even address the financial aspects, and associated stress, of the holidays. |
| When I said, "Tell me about it," I was agreeing with you -- not really asking you to tell me about it. |
| Too late now. You know how literal I can be. Lists aside, can you think of one or two things that you look forward to every holiday season? |
| That's easy. The first is I always make a conscious effort to spend more time with the girls. It can be as simple as just watching TV with Sawyer or FaceTiming with Natasha. The second is making a little time for me, which this year will mean being creative since I can't escape to the movies. |
| We both know it is not the movie – it is the movie popcorn. Anyway, the answer is "yes." Now, can you think of one or two unimportant things that are on your holiday to-do list just because they have always been on your list? |
| Yes. Definitely more than one or two. |
| Does your list have any of those "it would be nice if I had spare time" items that you know will not happen? |
| Of course, it does. I see what you're doing. You're making me admit that even though I understand and talk about focusing on what's really important, I sometimes forget to stop and think about it. |
| I was not asking for an admission of guilt, I was merely helping you remember to … Stop. Think. And, most importantly … Enjoy. |
How you celebrate July 4th may change from year to year (Red will still enjoy a quiet holiday, but this year will be reading as it may take all summer to get through “War and Peace”), but what should never change is remembering WHY (one of Black’s favorite words) we celebrate as well as the sacrifices made to live in a free country …
| This is going to be a very unusual July 4 th for me, with neither girl being home. Natasha always hated the fireworks, but Sawyer would insist we do all the traditional things – barbequing, lots of watermelon, and then watching the fireworks in the Texas heat and humidity. So, this year, I plan to make it a really “cool” holiday … staying in the air-conditioned house, watching a movie or one of my TV series, and celebrating my day of independence from any “mom” responsibilities with a big bucket of freshly popped popcorn! |
| Well, everyone celebrates differently. But, when I think of Independence Day, I think about the challenges our Founding Fathers faced when they drafted the Declaration of Independence , especially as they did not always agree on issues. Challenges our nation continues to face (it is a holiday, so I will not get into the increasingly divisive aspects of politics). And, I cannot help but wonder how many people realize the extent of the sacrifices made by those who signed it in exchange for our country’s freedom. Which is why, as we celebrate July 4th, we need to remember, |
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We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
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What do you get when you cross Flag Day (June 14) with June being Effective Communication Month? Well, if you include Black in the mix, you get one of Red’s favorite memories … and a unique way to think about the importance of communicating – whether in your personal or professional life. And especially if you’re in a racecar!
| This past weekend, I noticed a bunch of flags on my street and wondered why since July 4 th is still almost a month away. But this morning, I learned that today's Flag Day. |
| Well, for someone who likes to decorate for the holidays, I would have thought you would have known all about it. |
| I've heard of it, but I never really thought much about it, let alone when it is. I knew it had to do with the American flag, but it surprised me that it has nothing to do with Betsy Ross, which legend has made the first flag, although it seems there's no evidence to support that. |
| If you want an interesting "story", read about why the American flag is called Old Glory . Regardless, the American flag, like all flags, communicates a message. |
| I know you like to connect odd dots, but only you would see a connection between flags and communications. |
| Not really. In the case of the American flag, they needed something to communicate a new nation fighting for its freedom . But remember when I gave Natasha a set of racing flags years ago? |
| How could I forget? It was a very difficult and challenging time. And although you had already made me realize that different people like to communicate differently , the problem with Natasha wasn't so much how to communicate with her as figuring out when. We were frustrated and walking around on eggshells because we never knew when she was in a good mood or a bad mood, when it was safe to talk to her, and when she needed to be left alone. |
| Sometimes flags are the perfect way to communicate a message when words are not an option. |
| Leave it to you to use racing flags to solve what seemed like an impossible situation in a way that was not only clever but appealed to her because of her love of cars and racing. And we know where she got that from! |
| It just seemed logical. As did the cheat sheet where I basically "translated" the racing meanings of the different color flags for your use. For example, in racing, a green flag can either be the start of a race, a re-start, or just displayed to communicate safe racing. With Natasha, it would mean it was "safe" to talk to her. In racing, a yellow flag means caution and to slow down, which needs no further explanation. |
| I remember her telling me, quite emphatically, that a black flag means "Go away." Which made me laugh because it just seemed so, well, appropriate, given that's something I could see you saying. |
| On the track, it means to go to the pits, usually because you are in trouble. So, I cannot argue with your comment about it being appropriate for me. But, keep in mind that a red flag means to "Stop!" |
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There’s much debate about the role America should play in world politics and standing by our allies, and we can’t help but wonder … how many people look at history before forming their opinions? Which is why we feel so strongly about remembering D-Day (and are rerunning the post below), which is about so much more than just a day …
| I still can’t believe you didn’t know what D-Day was. |
| All I knew was it had to do with World War II and beaches. And, required lots of strategic planning. Remember, I am not a history buff like you. |
| Or a movie buff. There has been an assortment of D-Day movies, and I wouldn’t expect you to have watched the older movies, like “ The Longest Day” with John Wayne, but I figured you’d have seen “ Saving Private Ryan .” |
| The Tom Hanks movie? It was a great war movie, but from what I remember, it was about the search for a particular soldier during WWII. Although I remember the opening scene showed the horrors of war. Regardless, I do not get my “history” from movies that might take literary license for the sake of storytelling, even if Steven Spielberg’s movies are mostly accurate. |
| That opening scene WAS D-Day. |
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| I know that … now. I always remembered D-Day fell on June 6 because Mom and Daddy got married on June 6 (1950). And, almost 40 years later, you got married on their anniversary. |
| Well, that’s ancient history. And unfortunately, my marriage wasn’t as successful as D-Day. Although I’m not a WWII expert, D-Day’s also known as the Battle of Normandy and considered the beginning of the end of the war in Europe. It was an incredible turning point and changed the course of the war . And history. |
| I have always found it fascinating how a singular event can turn the tide, not only through its success in the moment but in its ability to inspire people. How bravery, perseverance, and the willingness to fight for what you genuinely believe, to the death, if necessary, is extremely powerful. |
| Are you talking about D-Day or more recent events, such as the war in Ukraine? I can draw parallels as they’re both about fighting for freedom in Europe, which also impacts the world. But it’s as if people refuse to learn lessons from history. And we live in a world, in a country, that’s becoming more and more polarized, with seemingly fewer and fewer people willing to put the greater good above themselves. |
| That is why days of remembrance, such as D-Day, are so important. I may not have known the specific details, but that does not stop me from appreciating and respecting the sacrifices that so many made for our country. At the time, those soldiers may not have known the far-reaching impact of their actions, or even whether they would be successful, but that did not lessen their commitment and bravery. |
| I can’t imagine the feeling of responsibility and willingness to die for the future of the free world. Historians regard it as one of the greatest military achievements ever, but not to lessen its significance, and I’m almost embarrassed to admit this, but I’ve never known what the “D” in D-Day stands for? Maybe Departure, Decision, or even Doomsday? Although I could make a case for Democracy, Determination, or Daring. |
| How about “Day”? And no, I am not being sarcastic. “ D-Day” was an Army designation used to indicate the start date for a specific field operation. So, it does not stand for anything. At least, not at the time … because D-Day now stands for so much. |
To honor the significance of D-Day, consider taking a few moments for these inspiring quotes.