Words & Banter

Birds Aren’t Real? This Is Unreal!

Photo by ideeone on iStock


Red's Head assets.rebelmouse.io

I'm still shaking my head, in amazement and amusement, at you telling me how there are people claiming that birds aren't real – they're surveillance drones.


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io

At first, I thought it was a joke. But then, I found a Newsweek article on the "Birds Aren't Real" movement that claims the government killed all birds and replaced them with surveillance drones.


Red's Head assets.rebelmouse.io

Well, if you hadn't forwarded it, I'd have thought you were messing with me! Anyway, my absolute favorite part is the "logic" that when the birds or drones or whatever you want to call them sit on powerlines, they're recharging. That's hilarious.


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io

And, in its own way, clever as it does sound plausible. After all, it is a much easier concept to understand than the explanation of why birds can sit on high-voltage wires and not get electrocuted.


Red's Head assets.rebelmouse.io

I've always wondered about that, but not enough that I want you to explain it. However, can you explain how anyone could believe that all birds are government-operated drones? It sounds more like an SNL skit. Please tell me people know this is just a joke or parody of conspiracy theories.


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io

Do they? Conspiracy theories have always existed, and thanks to the internet and social media, they are now running rampant. Some are bizarre, some are silly, and some are dangerous and toxic.


Red's Head assets.rebelmouse.io

Which I find scary. Especially since the only people who can dispute the conspiracies are experts, but if you think they're in on the conspiracy, then that just further feeds it.


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io

I disagree. All it takes is people to stop and think versus joining the flock and just following along. But, that is how these conspiracies gain traction.


Red's Head assets.rebelmouse.io

Joining the flock? Cute. And just another "hint" that this idea that birds are secretly spying on us is a prank or satire. I don't know how the organizer can maintain a straight face when they say this is real.


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io

Their FAQ (frequently asked questions) page is most amusing, stating, "Bird Poop is actually a form of liquidated tracking apparatus." But, one of the first things that caught my eye on their website is the focus on merchandise for sale. What a brilliant marketing scheme.


Red's Head assets.rebelmouse.io

Well, when I went to the site, what caught my eye was the Richard Nixon "quote" which, even given his involvement with the Watergate coverup, must have been made up, "We needed a way to keep an eye on the American citizens without them knowing. It was imperative, for their own safety of course. We hired only the best. It took years. We designed, built, tested, failed. We persisted. Eventually, over decades, we had it. A fleet of covert technological surveillance devices unlike anything the world had ever seen. We called them, 'Birds.'"


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io

Very effective. But, if it is an actual quote, it could refer to some surveillance drones they code-named "Birds" versus ALL birds. Especially as the history of drones goes back to the mid-1800s.


Red's Head assets.rebelmouse.io

Yes, but you're doing that "critical thinking" thing, and we both know that many people will read that quote and assume it's true. And supports the bird conspiracy theory.


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io

Then, I would call those people "bird brains," except I do not want to insult the intelligence level of birds.
Photo by chameleoneye for iStock

Tonight is the first night of Chanukah (FYI, there are multiple "correct" spellings), and while Red may be celebrating the Festival of Lights with potato latkes (pancakes), when she lights the menorah to symbolize bringing light into darkness, she’ll be laughing at Black’s car analogy …



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At the risk of Black coming up with another potato analogy, for me, Chanukah's all about potato latkes. The childhood memories of our dad grating pounds and pounds of potatoes to the point where I'm not sure I could see our kitchen table, many decades later, my eldest daughter taste-testing latkes from an assortment of places. (I love to cook, but latkes are a lot of work.)

Of course, the lighting of the menorah is also such a special part of the holiday celebration, whether the electric menorah that my parents had where you would "twist" each light bulb as the nights progressed or the more traditional menorah with candles that my daughters and I light each year (and never leave unattended).


Black's HeadBlackassets.rebelmouse.io


I never cease to be amazed by the miracle of Chanukah (regardless of whether you spell it Chanukah or Hanukkah, or some other variation) and how the oil that was only supposed to last one day instead lasted for eight days. It is as if your cellphone indicated it is at 12% but lasts eight days. Or, if the gas gauge in your car indicates you have 25 miles left, but you are able to drive 200 miles. Sometimes things happen that defy logic, and that is where faith takes over. And, a belief in something bigger than all of us.

Tomorrow is the start of Chanukah, the Festival of Lights, which celebrates hope and miracles – and who could not use hope and miracles?

Happy Chanukah!

Photo by Rabbitti for iStock

Every year on #GivingTuesday, Red tells Black that she knows how important giving is – whether time or money – but, unlike Black, she doesn’t have a meaningful charity that’s been part of her life for decades. We often “repeat” the conversation below, but this year, Black suggested that Red use #GivingTuesday to think about what charity inspires her or holds special meaning, and then get involved. Making it personal often ends up making it a year-round passion rather than a one-off obligation.

But no matter how you approach charity, beware of potential scammers. And, if in doubt — check them out! (Black likes GuideStar and Charity Navigator.)



red headred headassets.rebelmouse.io

I know today’s Giving Tuesday, but what I always find so amazing is how you treat every day as “Giving Tuesday."


Black's HeadBlackassets.rebelmouse.io

What makes you say that? I do not donate to an organization or charity every day.


red headred headassets.rebelmouse.io

You’re always so literal. I meant that the spirit of “giving to others”, whether donating or providing support in some way, seems to be part of your daily life.


Black's HeadBlackassets.rebelmouse.io

I think you are exaggerating.
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Underlying photo by Alleko on iStock

What’s so funny about the holiest day in Judaism, Yom Kippur, the “Day of Atonement”? A day where you fast as a way to help you deeply reflect on your past year, asking forgiveness, and then promising to do better.

Well, technically, nothing is funny about the holiday, but every time we think of this speaking engagement, it makes us laugh (as it did our audience) …



Red's Headassets.rebelmouse.io

I know that Yom Kippur isn't exactly known as one of the "fun" Jewish holidays, but every year, I can't help but laugh at what's easily my number one Yom Kippur memory.


Black's HeadBlackassets.rebelmouse.io

That is what makes memories … memorable. And, finding something to laugh at on Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, which is probably the most important and solemn Jewish holiday, would be memorable.


Red's Headassets.rebelmouse.io

I can't believe you're not even curious what it is!?
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