| I know that Yom Kippur isn't exactly known as one of the "fun" Jewish holidays, but every year I can't help but laugh at what's easily my number one Yom Kippur memory. |
| That is what makes memories … memorable. And, finding something to laugh at on Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, which is probably the most important and solemn Jewish holiday, would be memorable. |
| I can't believe you're not even curious what it is!? |
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| You know I love to "connect the dots", and all you had to say was Yom Kippur, fun, and memory. Obviously, it was when Rabbi Scott asked us to speak before his congregation on Yom Kippur. |
| Well, I still find it surreal that we were asked to speak about money on one of the High Holy Days. And that we titled our presentation, "Oy Vey, You Want To Talk About Money?" |
| The day is about reflection, making fundamental changes – or at least adjustments – and trying to become a better person. And, just because it is a spiritual journey, there is no reason you cannot make learning fun. |
| True. I remember the time Rabbi Scott put a piece of aluminum foil in the children's Yom Kippur service program to help them understand that Yom Kippur's a day for reflection. But even you must admit that making a congregation laugh about money on a religious holiday is a bit much. |
| But, memorable. A few years later, I met someone that attended that service, and he said he's never forgotten it. |
| For the content or all the food analogies?! I can remember we started by saying how we just wanted to give everyone some food-for-thought and then saying, "Oops, since Yom Kippur's a day of fasting, maybe bringing up the subject of food wasn't such a good idea." |
| Of course, it did not stop us from doing it, again and again. |
| How else could we explain our unexpected journey into personal finance without mentioning it started at our first speaking engagement … which was at a Jewish Federation breakfast? |
| Or, how our detour into criminal justice started with me meeting with the chaplain at a men's prison? But I knew it was meant to be when she told me they had the only kosher kitchen in the Texas prison system. |
| And each time we looked at each other and then the audience, and we all laughed! With each mention of food, it just got funnier and funnier. But there was no way to avoid it. |
| I know. How could you tell the story about realizing all the money you were mindlessly spending at Jamba Juice without mentioning your almost-daily smoothies? Or, how you went grocery shopping at Whole Foods because it was convenient but not cost-effective. Anyway, until that day, I never realized how so many of our stories have to do with food. |
| I think the highlight was toward the end when I was explaining how I felt overwhelmed trying to tackle personal finance. That at times, things seemed insurmountable, and then you told me … it's like eating an elephant, you can do it, just one bite at a time. And everyone started laughing again. |
| On any other day, I doubt that analogy would make you think of food. But, on Yom Kippur, and especially since we were presenting after at least 15 hours of fasting, everything makes you hungry |
| I guess it's like being so tired that you get slap happy. But I never thought a day of atonement and reflection could end up becoming a day of laughter. |
| On Yom Kippur, we wish people an "easy fast" or a "meaningful fast" … and if a bit of laughter, even if not intended, helps, what is wrong with that? |
| Good point. For that matter, you don't need to be Jewish to take a day, or even just an hour, to stop, to think, and to improve. |
| No fasting required. |
| The last few days have been beautiful fall weather, and I can't help but wonder – do you ever miss having your Ferrari convertible? |
| Although some days are perfect convertible weather, given I barely drove it the last few years I owned it, averaging less than 50 miles a year, I can honestly say, "No." In fact, I cannot even remember the last time I drove it. |
| I can't help you with that, but I'll never forget the last day we taught at KIPP Houston High School, and you drove it there. You should've seen the student's faces as you were lowering the top on it. |
| Funny thing is I never took the car to KIPP because I did not want anyone to think I was showing off, but I forgot how exciting it is for motorheads to see special cars – whether new or vintage. |
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I doubt everyone crowding around your car was a motorhead, but they certainly
were excited to see your car. Boys AND girls! At the risk of sounding warm and fuzzy, I
think the fact you not only drove a Ferrari, but also raced them, gave the girls a feeling of
empowerment, that they really can do anything. |
| I guess because I always worked in male-dominated industries, I got used to being the "token" woman. Regardless, I never look at things as being gender-specific. |
| That's because you never look at anything like the rest of the world does, or at least most people do. A perfect example of that is you giving Juan a ride in the Ferrari. I doubt many people would have done that. |
| It seemed only fair since he tried to make a "deal" with me the day before – a hand of poker or even a flip of a coin. If he wins, he gets a ride in the Ferrari. If I win, he will be my slave for a day. Giving him a ride in the car was a reward for having the chutzpah to try to make a deal with me. And, in the two years we taught at KIPP, of the over 200 students who took our Personal Finance & Life 101 class, he was the only one ever to do that. |
| I'll never forget how you also told them that although it may not be the proper definition for the Yiddish word "chutzpah," the real-life definition is "having balls." |
| How else would you explain it? |
| You should know as many people have used that word to describe you. And it was consistent with the lesson we taught them about how you "confronted" Bob Weinstein (of the movie producing Weinstein Brothers) at a conference in New York. (Granted, it was well before the #MeToo scandal.) You realized you had nothing to lose, not to mention you were well-prepared. |
| In most scenarios, if you do not ask for something, you will not receive it. So, what is the risk of asking? Someone may say "no"? The way I see it, you are no worse off than before you asked. So, in reality, there is no downside risk, but there IS upside potential. They may say "yes." |
| True. And I laughed, although I wasn't surprised when everyone else started asking for a ride in the Ferrari! |
| Except Juan did not just ask for a ride. He tried to negotiate a deal. He structured it so that there was an upside for me if he lost the bet, which obviously would be the downside for him. But, what impressed me the most was that he was proactive and took a chance, albeit a long shot, to get something he wanted. |
| And given the smile on his face when you drove off, it obviously paid off. I bet, even though it has been many years, it's something he's never forgotten. |
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The lesson or the ride
in the Ferrari? |
| Both. And I will go out on a limb and say I bet many of the kids standing around the car when you told Juan to jump in, and then explained why, may also remember not only that day but the importance of the lesson. |
| Then, it was a perfect day for a convertible ride. |
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| Thanks for sending me Natasha's Austin-inspired business plan. But while I know that's her future, I can't help but think about the first time I took her to Austin. |
| All I remember is that it was love at first sight. |
| It was on our way home from taking Sawyer to camp, and I told her we were making a slight "detour". She was so excited when I pulled up to the hotel as she's always loved hotels. But that night, as we walked onto Congress Avenue Bridge and saw the thousands and thousands of bats fly out into the sunset, she was mesmerized and "in love". |
| Although I knew about the bats (the largest urban colony of bats in the world), if it were not for Natasha, I never would have planned a trip to Austin just to see them. But having watched her watching the bats, I was not surprised, years later, when her first tattoo was a bat. |
| That may not have been surprising, but I was shocked when a few weeks later you decided to get a tattoo, and it was identical to hers. I didn't know that you were such a fan of bats. |
| It was not the bats; it was the fact it was identical to her tat. Although, I think Natasha and I should add a few more bats. And this time, do it in Austin. |
| It's amazing how so many of my memories of the girls growing up are connected to Austin. |
| Funny thing is whenever I would be there with you and the girls, and they would "drag" me to that old-time candy store at the top of Congress, I would see things I had not seen since we were little, so would be reminded of us as children. |
| That's always one of the first places they'd want to go to in Austin. That and Green Mesquite BBQ. They both loved Austin, and it wasn't like going to a large city, where there are so many places to go and sites to see. They were always happy to go back to the same familiar places and enjoy simple things, like that snow cone truck or even just walking around downtown. |
| For as long as I can remember, Austin has always been a foodie town. And, it had food trucks before they became popular around the country. Austin has a unique culture, which may be why the girls, but especially Natasha, love it. And, its "Keep Austin Weird" vibe not only makes it the perfect place for her, but has provided some great ideas for her business concept. |
| I'll leave the business analysis to you. I know that she's doing that as part of her studies in the U.K., but I prefer to think about the great times we've had in Austin. And the mom in me thinks she'd be very happy to one day make Austin her home. |
| Especially as that's where millions of her beloved Austin bats live. |
| I'm still smiling at you letting Sawyer drive your Mercedes G-wagen. Although I know that her dream car's a Ford F-150, I think yours is her "fantasy car". |
| I knew the "long way" to drive back to your house, but after asking her if she knew the best way, it seemed easier to have her drive. |
| Well, you might have thought of it as efficient, but she thought it was exciting. And she told me that she was honored you trusted her to drive. |
| Did she mention that once we got back to your neighborhood, we saw a huge turtle on the road? Moving very slowly, of course, so I was not concerned it would become an unexpected road obstacle. |
| Of all the things she might encounter in our neighborhood – cyclists, Amazon delivery trucks, dog walkers – to find a turtle in the street was probably the last thing she was expecting. |
| Or, me. I know we laugh about me needing Benadryl to visit you in the suburbs, but it is due to all the pets and children – not wildlife. |
| That turtle made me think of Daddy. I'm not sure you were still living at home at the time, but do you remember when he "saved" the turtle on the road? |
| I have no idea what you are talking about. |
| Daddy was driving on Wantagh Avenue, near Kwong Ming (our favorite Chinese restaurant growing up in Massapequa), when, all of a sudden, he pulled off the road and hopped out of the car. |
| If I remember correctly, that road did not get much traffic. |
| True, but there were still cars on the road, and it was still a very unusual thing for him to do. I was probably around ten or so and sitting in the back seat, so was a little surprised when the car stopped, and he quickly got out. But when he said, "I'll be right back," I could tell by his voice that everything was ok. |
| Considering that Daddy was very mild-mannered and not the sort of person to panic or to overreact, I am not sure the tone of his voice would have been a good indicator. |
| Regardless, I wasn't the most observant of kids, so unless the car were on fire, I probably wouldn't have thought much of any of it. So, while he walked across the road, I didn't think twice about getting out of the car to watch what he was doing. Not because I was worried, but out of curiosity. |
| It is hard to imagine that same scenario today, for an assortment of reasons. Unless, of course, it was staged for YouTube or Instagram. |
| I know, but it was a different time. Decades ago. |
| I can picture Daddy waving the cars to slow down while scooping up the turtle and depositing it well away from the side of the road. |
| Close. He disappeared on the other side of the road for a few minutes, and when he returned to the car, he told me that there was a stream, so he had carried the turtle down the bank and placed it by the water. It was a hot summer day, and he figured that the poor turtle had somehow wandered far from home and was now trying to find water. Not to mention grass and shade. |
| That sounds like Daddy. Well, the conditions were similar when Sawyer and I saw the turtle in your neighborhood, but I have no idea where the local stream is located. |
| I wish I had been around, as I'd have paid homage to Daddy by scooping up the turtle and at least try to find it a safe place. And based on what Sawyer told me, if she sees him (or her) again, that's exactly what she plans to do. |
| Like father, like daughter … like granddaughter. |