Words & Banter

More Than Just Boxes And Ballots

Red wonders if we can blame it on Bruce Willis or maybe Robert Downey, Jr. Blame them for what? The popularity of action movies over the last decades – ranging from normal people demonstrating almost impossible feats of bravery and skill (yes, she's thinking "Die Hard") to super heroes conquering the day no matter the odds (like Marvel's "The Avengers") – that has greatly influenced our idea of what's a "hero". (Black defers to Red when it comes to movies, unless you want to talk about the business aspects of the industry.)

Until we stop and think about it.


Then our idea of what's a hero changes to who's a hero, and is much different than those in blockbuster movies. Instead of it being larger-than-life figures, it becomes someone who displays courage, someone we admire. In reality, we've always been surrounded by heroes, they're just more noticeable during a crisis. During the pandemic, first responders, front-line healthcare personnel, and grocery-workers have become some of our most vital and appreciated heroes.

But heroes can be everyday people who merely go out of their way for others. Maybe a neighbor who checks in with the elderly couple next door. Or, the person who calls someone they know is lonely. It may not seem "heroic" to you, but it does to the recipient. Quite simply, heroes come in many different forms, whether they make the front page of a newspaper, trend on social media, or are only known by one other person.

Last Wednesday at the siege on the Capitol, as government officials and their staff were quickly moved to safety, we saw many nameless heroes. Most would probably say there were merely doing "their job" but in our opinion that doesn't make them any less courageous. However, there's an image that stood out amongst all the horrific ones – the ceremonial Electoral College ballot boxes that were rescued by quick thinking congressional aides. While some people may wonder why the staff would risk their own safety to save a few wooden boxes and pieces of papers, we see those boxes as symbols of American democracy. So, when we think about those aides, we see courage, patriotism, and a commitment to something that's bigger than themselves. Bigger than all of us. And, to us, that makes them heroes. True American heroes.

Photo by Iam Anupong on iStock

After decades away from golf, Red decided she wanted to start playing again. On a recent Sunday, after going to the driving range, she met up with Black. And the very first thing Black said to her? “So, are you wearing white pantyhose?” They both laughed, but hours later, Red realized the perfect reply (don’t you hate when that happens?) would have been, “No, but I’m honoring Skin Cancer Awareness Month!" Confused? Then read one of Red's favorite posts ...

I'll never forget the day. It was an "almost" ordinary day out on the golf course with my mom and dad during the heat of a Long Island summer. Now, if "Long Island" conjures up images of stately manors on the North Shore (think "Great Gatsby") or beachfront mansions in the Hamptons (think Robin Leach and his popular show "Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous"), you can put those out of your head. I'm not talking about some fancy country club golf course, just a regular public course.

Keep Reading ...Show less
Design by Sawyer Pennington, Underlying photo by Ye Jinghan on Unsplash

Second Chance Month may almost be over, but giving someone a second chance, especially for those who’ve been on the wrong side of the law, shouldn’t end when April does. Because we’ve all made mistakes, and a second chance is a gift that can make all the difference, as Red dramatically learned below



red headred headassets.rebelmouse.io

I had no idea that April was “Second Chance Month” until you sent me the official proclamation. I find it interesting that in the midst of juggling our usual million and one Red & Black things, your interest in criminal justice, which I know you consider a “passion project”, is as strong as ever, maybe even stronger.


Black's HeadBlackassets.rebelmouse.io

It is not intentional, sometimes “passion projects” find you. And, when you least expect it.


red headred headassets.rebelmouse.io

Or where you least expect it! Only you would take a “field trip” to a men’s prison.


Black's HeadBlackassets.rebelmouse.io

I will not get on my soapbox about how our education system contributes to the criminal justice problem. I will never forget a friend of mine who was formerly incarcerated telling me, “Rehabilitating people makes the assumption they were habilitated in the first place.”


red headred headassets.rebelmouse.io

When you stop and think about that statement, it’s pretty powerful! But I have to smile as once upon a time you, and I, used words like “offenders” and “prisoners” until we learned how our choice of words could be dehumanizing.


Blackassets.rebelmouse.io

Says the woman who once believed in the idea of “lock ’em up and throw away the key”.
Keep Reading ...Show less
Photo by mevans on iStock
We first ran the post below five years ago, and we’re glad April’s no longer Autism Awareness Month but now is Autism Acceptance Month. Especially as autism seems to have become more commonplace (partially due to improved diagnosis, but also less stigma). Most important, though, is learning about autism, including how to talk about it in a non-judgmental way … because that’s what helps all of us move from awareness to acceptance.


red headred headassets.rebelmouse.io


Did you know that April's Autism Awareness Month? I wasn't aware (pun intended) of it until I read our local homeowner's monthly newsletter and it caught my eye.


Black's HeadBlackassets.rebelmouse.io


Actually, last month the founding organization, the Autism Society, changed "Awareness "to "Acceptance" to foster inclusivity, as knowing about something is very different from accepting it. But I am guessing that is not the point of this call.


red headred headassets.rebelmouse.io


Although it isn't autism, it reminded me of years ago when we found out that Natasha has learning disabilities.


Black's HeadBlackassets.rebelmouse.io


I think you mean DIFF-abilities.


red headred headassets.rebelmouse.io


Of course, that's another thing I remember. I was focused on the negative aspects of her diagnosis until you asked me, point-blank, "Why are they called disabilities?" And proceeded to explain that everyone has different strengths and weaknesses.


Black's HeadBlackassets.rebelmouse.io


Exactly! Imagine the world if everyone excelled at math, but flunked English. Or, a world of lawyers, but no musicians. Some people are better at social skills, while others excel at handling technical data. Why not just say that people who have different skillsets and abilities have DIFF-abilities versus making them feel like they have shortcomings?
Keep Reading ...Show less