Chapter 15: I Need A Warning System
It’s easy to forget that charity is a year-round event, not just for the holiday season or when natural disasters happen. Since today’s International Day of Charity – Red couldn’t help but remember when Black explained her long-time involvement with Make-A-Wish (see below) … and realizing that helping others might end up being one of the best things you can do. For others. For yourself.
Typically, when Red asked Black questions, she received questions in return. Or flippant comments. When Red asked her about charity, and specifically Make-A-Wish, she got straight answers, and that alone got Red’s attention. Before this conversation, Red thought her sister’s involvement with Make-A-Wish was very generous, both of her time and her money, but attributed much of it to the fact she had surpluses of both in her life. But once Black made her realize that her involvement went back to her corporate life, years when she might have had spare money but was working ridiculous hours, Red gained a new respect for Black’s commitment. But when Black said how it had become her “reality check” on life, Red began to understand that we all need something to help us remember what’s genuinely important.
P.S. – Charity and helping others remain an important part of our lives (and, much to the chagrin of our accountants and attorneys, drive much of our work in the education and criminal justice worlds). Black’s long-time commitment to Make-A-Wish set an example for Red’s daughters when they were growing up, and made them aware of how important it is to not only appreciate what you have but to think of others. And whether it’s an ongoing commitment to a single organization, helping various charities throughout the year, celebrating targeted donation days (such as #GivingTuesday or World Wish Day), or when specific natural disasters or humanitarian needs require immediate aid, charitable giving (whether money or time) – can make all the difference. Not only to the recipient, but as Black pointed out to Red all those years ago, for yourself.
| I’m curious about something, though. As children, we were never exposedto charity, so what got you involved with Make-A-Wish? Even Natasha has askedme about Make-A-Wish, because she has seen the kids’ artwork at your house andrecognizes the logo from seeing it on your race car. |
red headassets.rebelmouse.io | It was years ago. I was invited to play in a Make-A-Wish golftournament, and at the dinner some of the kids came out and told their Wishstories. They mentioned their illnesses and the doctors and the hospitals inpassing — as if it was just a minor detail in their stories. But when theytalked about their wishes, it was with such excitement and pure happiness thatit was overwhelming. A few weeks earlier, I had received a huge bonus at workand so I was feeling flush with cash, and when I saw the power of a wish — thehope, the joy, the strength it could provide — it made me look at money in atotally different way. When you meet children who are seriously ill and yourealize no amount of money can “fix the problem,” but yet something as simpleas wishing for a puppy or to meet a celebrity can make such a huge differencein their lives, then you are reminded of what is really important in life. Andwhat is not. |
| Wow. I don’t think I have ever heard you thispassionate about anything. |
| Probably not. Make-A-Wish has been an importantpart of my life for a long time. I know I am very fortunate in many respects,but sometimes I get wrapped up in day-to-day life and forget that. I may haveproblems with one of the cars, or I am annoyed with Larry, or it is just a badday, Make-A-Wish reminds me that my problems or frustrations are minuscule inthe scheme of things. |
| Thisis a side of you that I rarely see. I’m impressed. And proud. |
| Thanks,but Make-A-Wish does far more for me than I do for them. Partly as a substitutefor not having children of my own, but more importantly as my reality check onlife. It is my constant reminder of what is important. And although I may notbe able to cure the kids, the fact I can make their lives a little better byhelping grant wishes is the least — the very least — I can do in return. |
Blackassets.rebelmouse.ioEvery time we meet with Jackie Aguilera, we’re still in awe of her expertise and experience in adult education. She continues to bring creativity and passion to her students, while also raising awareness that literacy is about so much more than reading and writing. September is National Literacy Month, so we’re re-running this post because it’s even more relevant today than when it was first written.
Although we have an update: Jackie’s no longer with the Mayor’s Office of Adult Literacy, but given the high demand for her expertise, we wonder if she’s going to take a position with another entity or share her knowledge as a consultant. Regardless, we know she’ll remain a bright light in the world of adult education.
| I have a confession to make, which I’m sure will make you roll your eyes. |
| Interesting caveat and probably true. |
| Every time we meet with Jackie (Aguilera) from the Mayor’s Office of Adult Literacy and hear what she’s doing in the world of adult education, I feel like I’m back in school and having to take copious notes. |
| I am more than happy to send you “homework assignments” as I come across relevant articles and research. |
| Thanks, but no thanks. I’ll stick to taking notes. But that does explain why you’re so knowledgeable about literacy. |
| But, reading information is very different from being at the forefront of literacy innovation. And, if we had never met Jackie, I never would have realized how literacy is more than the dictionary definition, and encompasses more than just reading and writing. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | But that alone is such a critical part of all of our lives and can make the difference between struggling and success. Although I never stopped to think about any of that before we met Jackie. |
| The funny thing is we first met her because of financial literacy. |
| Yes, and I remember wondering why you decided we should go to a Houston Money Week meeting. And while our book was approved as a financial literacy textbook by the (Texas) State Board of Education, I still didn’t think we were qualified to talk about the topic. |
| But, we did go. And, we met Jackie. |
| That’s something I’ll never forget. I remember I let you do the talking when “newbies” had to introduce themselves, or I’d have talked their ears off. After the meeting, this confident but very approachable woman came striding across the room, extended her hand to me, and introduced herself. At the time, she was Literacy Coordinator at EastSide University. |
| All I remember was her energy, commitment, and passion for financial literacy. Not usually a topic discussed with such enthusiasm. |
| There’s an understatement. And not only did it take me by surprise, but I hate to admit it, it was contagious. Especially once we started working with her. |
| Another confession? |
| Maybe. Looking back, I still shake my head in amazement at the incredibly creative ways she made personal finance, typically such a “boring” topic, come alive. And how she used outside-the-box approaches to making learning relevant. |
| And, fun. I still cannot believe she was able to turn something as basic as one of our bookmarks into an hour-long interactive class – using it to not only get conversation going, but to introduce critical life skills. |
| I can’t believe how she incorporates our animated “teasers” into her literacy presentations. Using them to make a point in a light-hearted and fun way. Even if it points out how I was a poster child for not being “literate” when it comes to an assortment of life topics. |
| I dislike the term “literacy” because it makes people feel like they are “illiterate” when they do not know something. In reality, they may never have been exposed to the information or given an opportunity to learn it. |
| I can tell you first-hand that initially I felt stupid, until you pointed out I was merely sheltered. But that’s given me so much more empathy when I think of other people in the same position I once was. |
| Which is why she had us do an assortment of “ConversationStarters” for various literacy topics that she uses – ranging from where this all started – financial literacy – to digital literacy, health literacy, and even news literacy and environmental literacy. To make the topics accessible in a non-threatening way. |
| All I know is that she made me realize that literacy impacts every aspect of our lives. And it has an amazing ripple effect as it then lets us share our knowledge with our families. |
| You forgot to mention that Jackie made us aware of National Literacy Month, although I am not sure it highlights the full extent of the concept of literacy. But, anything that raises awareness is important. |
| I know it’s changed my life in many ways. And not only in terms of Red & Black, although being able to help her, albeit in a small way, help give people the desire, the confidence, the motivation, to learn is something I’ll always be grateful to Jackie for. |
| Since we are strolling down memory lane, I cannot believe you did not mention how working with Jackie all these years has led to a deep respect for her and the friendship that has developed. |
| So, are you going to confess that you can be warm and fuzzy? |
| Never. I was merely stating facts. |
Familiar with the saying, "It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity”? Well, with unbearably hot temperatures around the country, does it really matter which it is? Or even if it’s both?! Which is why this older “Ask Red & Black” is still relevant …
| I'm laughing because I suspect Black would argue that I rarely look "nice" in the sense that I rarely "dress up". Even before the pandemic, unless I had a Red& Black business meeting or speaking engagement, my normal "look" was that of super comfy – workout or very casual clothing and minimal makeup. Here in Texas, where the heat and humidity are oppressive, I'm always looking for tips because the moment you step outside, you're going to start sweating, your makeup will drip, and your hair will either frizz or wilt (neither's a good look for me). So, I keep my skincare simple and summer-friendly – extremely lightweight, tinted facial moisturizer with a high SPF (so I only need a single product) and waterproof mascara. I've never been very creative when managing my long hair for the summer, but my daughter let me in on a secret when she straightened my hair for me. Unlike my rushed approach, she took an extra 10 minutes to do it in smaller sections, which looked great when my hair was down, but amazingly, even made my ponytail look "finished". Taking a little more time to do it right makes a huge difference, as now my hair stands up to the heat and humidity. (Good news is she's always willing to do it for me, bad news is that she goes to college in a few months, so I'll have to learn how to do it myself.) |
| When I started racing cars in the mid-1990s, I cut my hair very short so I could easily style it with some water and hair goo when I removed my helmet, which makes it perfect for summer. (Plus, I calculated that I could save over 10 hours/week, or five full days a year, by not dealing with my hair.) In terms of clothing, it is a function of where you are going or where you work (obviously, if you are in the banking industry, you will dress very differently from someone who works for a design or marketing firm). For the last few decades, I have worn the same "uniform" – dark slacks or jeans, white shirt, blazer, and colorful Hermès shawl. In the summer, I select pieces that are light-colored, loose-fitting, and breathable fabrics, but if I had to give one tip, it would be to wear layers since going in and out of air-conditioning can be a challenge, although I see it as a fashion opportunity. In fact, that is how my "signature" shawls started as, regardless of the season, I would always have one with me to handle changes in temperature. |
No matter the reason for a garage sale – whether to get rid of things you’re not using anymore, an attempt to declutter, or estate sale “leftovers” – they can be about so much more than just “stuff”. And is why we’re rerunning one of Red’s favorite posts. Plus, Saturday’s National Garage Sale Day. (Yes, that’s a real thing.)
| Thanks for the accounting of your garage sale. But, given how many hours you spent preparing for it, and then the actual sale itself, did you calculate how much you“earned” on a $/hour basis? |
| No, all I know is that it seemed to take forever to go through everything in Mom’s house and decide what to keep, what to sell, what to donate. And what to trash. As far as the garage sale, I’ll give you your half the next time I see you. |
| Keep my half. You did all the work. I did not even offer to help. |
| And that was a big help. Thank you. |
| Obviously, you must be exhausted because you are making no sense. |
| Sorry, but I have a specific way of running garage sales, and the last thing I needed was another “cook in the kitchen”. |
| Not a good analogy as “cook” is a four-letter word that I do not use. |
| Cute. But seriously, I knew if I had asked you to help, you would’ve. But I can only imagine how you’d have reacted when you first saw all the stuff for sale. Especially as I treat garage sales as a way to get rid of items that I know have very little value. I’m not trying to maximize the money I make; I’m just trying to make the stuff “go away”. In fact, I don’t even put prices on them. |
| That all makes sense. Except for not having everything pre-priced. That would drive me crazy. How do you know what to charge people? |
| It’s an experience thing and another reason why I didn’t ask you to help. I have a sense of prices, but not something I could quantify in advance. When someone arrives, I tell them that everything’s cheap and give them an example. They usually look at me like, “Wow, she means it.” And then I tell them to collect what they wantand that I promise to give them a good price. And I do. |
| Is that why you and Mom never had joint garage sales? I cannot imagine she would let you determine prices on the spot. |
| Actually, she’s the one who “taught” me not to price things. That if someone picks up something or you see them looking at it, they’re interested. And that’s all you need to know. Where we differed was in how much to charge. To her, it was fun, but also a way to make money. To me, a garage sale isn’t my retirement account. It’s my way to get rid of stuff, especially big, bulky stuff. |
| In other words, people are paying you to haul off your trash. Or, save you trips taking stuff to your local thrift stores. |
| Exactly. Although I still take a lot of items to thrift stores that would probably sell for a decent price at a garage sale because I believe in what they’re doing, and I know that my donations make a difference. But I forgot how fun a garage sale can be, meeting people and laughing, just making connections, and knowing that someone will now enjoy and/or use your things. Or, in this case, Mom’s things. |
| Is there a particular age group that came to your garage sale? |
| It was truly a mix of people. Not counting the kids tagging along with their parents, which reminded me of when the girls would set up a lemonade stand to benefit Make-A-Wish at my garage sales years ago, they ranged from 20-somethings to senior citizens. But I’m almost afraid to ask why you asked. |
| I will not get into studies and statistics, but younger people are really into the environment and reusing older things, especially clothing (which is one of the three “new” R’s – reduce– reuse – recycle). So, garage sales, along with thrift stores, are becoming more popular than ever. |
| I love it! And the idea of so many of Mom’s things, now that she’s passed, will get to live on and be enjoyed by others. |
| At the risk of sounding like a MasterCard commercial, there are some things that money cannot buy. Like sentimental value and fond memories. |
| I know. Which is why the process of sorting everything was so time-consuming. Interestingly, when that came up in conversation during the garage sale, so many people could relate and then shared their own stories. It was as if they wanted me to know that Mom’s things were getting a good home. |
| Well, if you add that to the cash you made, it sounds like a very successful garage sale. Hopefully, the next sale, being an estate sale with larger and higher-priced items, will be as successful. And, although I tried to get you to use a professional“estate sale” company that would do everything for you, I am beginning to understand why you decided to do it yourself. |
| The hardest part was culling and organizing, and there was no way I’d let strangers go through all of Mom’s things. And the internet makes “advertising” the sale and posting items online very easy. All-in-all, there’s no reason we can’t do it ourselves. |
| We?! |
| Yes, because your ability to combine photos into a single image and correct my grammar is important. But your spreadsheets will be critical. |
| Now, that I can do. |
Maybe Skin Cancer Advice, But Don’t Expect A Compliment From A Sarcastic Sister